Build-A-Story

I've always loved those one-line-at-a-time community stories. Anyway, here's one at Book Blog that myself and Queen Medb have participated in.

Take a look, and add a line!

Our Litigious Nation

Abourezk Sues Over ‘Traitor’ List

Apparently a former Senator is suing a website for calling him a traitor. The lawsuit is not expected to survive.

However, if it did there would be one positive thing. All Democrats could join in a class-action suit and sue Ann Coulter.

P.S.: Haven't heard much about ol' Ann in the last few weeks. Have her 15 minutes finally passed? Does anyone - conservative, liberal, libertarian, Ferengi... -- consider her a respectable representative of conservative ideals and values?

Google Referrals

Google Referrals

I've been getting quite a few hits lately from folks looking for "Cancun naked photo" or "WTO naked photo". Apparently bits and pieces of this post are being referenced.

Well, if I had one I wouldn't post it, but you're welcome to look around!

Oh, yeah, just to keep pulling in that Google traffic, here are some more topics I might be writing about, somewhere....

J-Lo and Ben Affleck

Jamal Lewis

Beagle

Bassett Hounds

Al Franken (may be a little late on this one)


Some more recent Google referral phrases of interest:

"women clotheses photo" (apparently Gollum is now blogging)

"oakland raider governor" (they'll let anyone run in CA)

"what da heck is a visionary philosopher" (don't ask me)

"drunk bunker t.shirt site online in store" (again, don't ask me)

UPDATE: AlphaPatriot speaks on the same subject. What's the subject? Googling for Boobs.

Forgot? Forgot???

Yesterday Instapundit (nlr) posted a picture of one of the folks falling out of one of the WTC windows. He later removed it due to bandwidth restrictions. One of his readers was glad he posted it (although some have disagreed, due to its graphic nature), and said:

"You were exactly right to post the photo. I'm afraid that too many people have forgotten the horror of that day.

I don't understand this. Who does he actually think has forgotten the horror?

I know he's actually talking about forgetting the significance of the event, not the event itself, but really.... I read things all over yesterday, and have seen numerous similar laments - "People've forgotten what happened!" "You can't just move on", etc.

I don't care what side you're on, if you're far left, far right, Democrat, Republican, northerner, southerner, LA or NYC, pro-war or anti-war, there's not a single American - at home or abroad - who has "forgotten the horror of that day".

To suggest that is to demean all Americans' sense of honor and justice. We've lived with the horror for 731 days now, and will keep living with it - every day - for years.

What....what posts, what articles, who did you talk to that has "forgotten the horror of that day"???

People deal with grief in different ways. Some confront it head on, others retreat. Some post long remembrances, others remember quietly. Some try to think happy thoughts, like kids...family...home. Some are simply thankful for what they had. Some post Happy Birthday messages to far-away brothers. Some post pictures, both before and after. Some air grievances. Some cry...

But we never forgot. And none of us - none of us - ever will.

Update on a Long-ago Topic

Remember the Underground Church simulation being run by Forest Hills Baptist Church? And the lawsuit filed against the church accusing them of terrorist-like activities?

The website Youth Specialties had removed their page describing the event -- apparently either to avoid legal troubles or angry bloggers, whichever is worse - but anyhow, it's back up.

Whatever happened to the lawsuit?

More Drive-time Conversations

Me: It sure is nice outside.

GiggleGirl: Is it still summer?

Me: Yes. Well, technically it's still summer. But it'll be fall soon.

GiggleGirl: No, it's not fall.

Me: Why not?

GiggleGirl: What?

Me: Why isn't it fall yet?

GiggleGirl: Because it's Wednesday. (duh!)

Me: Okay.



Well, that explains it...

My Ubiquitous 9/11 Post

Since it's apparently required that all bloggers do a 9/11 remembrance post, here's mine.

My little brother Roger was born 9/11/71, and is celebrating his 32nd birthday today. He turned 30 two years ago.

Sometimes he reads my blog, so if you see this Rog - Happy birthday, bro. We miss you and I want nephews and neices sometime before I turn 40. Keep strumming!

A Reason to Go On

I'm back!
Is Clinton still president?

Al Franken on the Daily Show last night

I've died and gone to heaven :)

He is funny. And I almost daily forget how funny Jon Stewart is.

The best part of the interview was Franken's prediction of the campaign commercial that the Democrat nominee for president should make using Bush's aircraft carrier-landing footage. Let's just say it also included Bush being AWOL from the National Guard, John Kerry in Vietnam, and...a pirate.

Stripping for Anti-Globalization

Naked activists protest WTO meeting

"CANCUN, Mexico (AP) -- Activists marched in the streets and stripped on the beaches in an attempt to derail a meeting of the World Trade Organization, at which representatives of 146 countries will try to increase global commerce without throwing millions out of work.

[...]

In one of the first protests Monday, 29 activists stripped off their clothes on a public beach and spelled out "No WTO" in the sand with their bodies. "

First of all, this is different from a typical day in Cancun....how?

Second, where exactly in the act stripping and spelling out an slogan on the beach does it contain persuasion abilities? I can understand that protesting and marching can disrupt proceedings, and of course violence causes its own problems, but....stripping??

Let's take a look into the crystal ball....Calling Mexico....come in, Mexico...

Doodly doodly doodly doodly (shimmer effect)

Pierre: Abdul! What are zhose people doing on zat beach down there??

Abdul: Hm, this is do not know - can you tell, Helmut?

Helmut: Vat is los? Dey zeem to be shtripping out of der clotheses! Dey ish all naked down dere! Vere is der camera??

Earl: Here, Helmut - take mahn! Hit's one of them thar fancy models....kin you see anythin'? Hey, José - move outta the way, ding-dang it!

José: Mi amigos - please, we moost sign the documents, quickly! Before they do something else even more ra---hey, look at that senôrita over there! (signs document in the wrong place, obscuring the wording)

Sven: Ya! Look out, José! You're smearing da ink! Here, let me try (Begins signing the document, but soon trails off the page onto the table) Oh, my....take a look at those!!!

(Pages take document away, later it is discovered they actually signed a hastily-switched treaty document that promises the immediate abolishing of all national borders. Chaos ensues, and the world infrastructure crumbles as we know it.)

Doodly doodly doodly doodly (shimmer effect)

Whew....I hope that never happens....

Finally....why do these things never happen in Knoxville? Oh yeah - it's called Fraternity and Sorority rush at UT.

Target="_blank"

This is a plea to all bloggers.

When writing a post that includes a link - whether it's to another blogsite, an online article, a graphic or anything else - please consider opening another browser window for the new page. Roughly half of the blogs I visit do this already - Thank You! - but the other half who don't make it difficult to return back to their site.

Here's how I read articles that are heavily linked, or rather how I read them if they're well-linked. As I read, if there's a link I want to click on I'll click it, ALT-TAB back to the original page while it's loading and continue reading. When the page loads, I'll ALT-TAB back to it, read the article or post as necessary or maybe save it for a while. I'll go back to the original page again, continue reading, opening links as they come. When external links open new windows, it eliminates the possibility of getting lost on another site. Many times I've finished an article that was linked from another site, close the window and realize I just closed the Blog I was reading that linked to it. Sometimes I'll go back, sometimes I won't but it's a pain to return once the window's closed.

It's easy to do - I don't know if Movable Type or other online services has automatic linking, but if they do just choose to open links in a new window. For Blogspot and those doing straight HTML, simply add the phrase target="_blank" to your <a href=""> tag. This will cause a new window to open whenever the link is clicked on.

Thanks for your time and attention.

Downtown Snobbery

On Sunday the entire Perspective section of the Knoxville News Sentinel was taken over by a piece on what the future Mayor of Knoxville should know about our town. Scott Baker has put together what is actually an interesting profile of my hometown, and how different the attitudes are between residents of different areas of the city. I haven't had a chance to read the whole thing yet (church and NFL wait for no man) so haven't gotten to the East and South Knoxville sections yet, but I will and probably will comment on them later.

However, the Downtown and West Knoxville sections deserve commentary. I'll start with Downtown first - you can read the whole thing online here.

[Disclaimer: I grew up in Fountain City, which is the northern-most suburb of Knoxville while still in the city limits. I lived on the UT campus for three years, and since then have lived in West Knoxville and West Knox County. I currently live outside the city limits - barely - so have no vote in the upcoming election, but still consider myself a life-long Knoxvillian.]

'At lunchtime on a steamy summer day, John Griggs ambles along the Market Street sidewalk, past rumbling machinery that drowns out the street preachers, on his way back to the Miller's Building, where he works as a sales manager for ImagePoint.

"I think this will be a beautiful addition when it's finished," Griggs says of the square's facelift. "A vibrant downtown is what makes major cities attractive."'

Here's a common misconception. Sure, a downtown area is probably most visible to tourists, but it's not necessarily what makes a city attractive to perspective residents. It's a component, but not the only thing.

'Perched on a tall chair just inside the entrance of the Tomato Head restaurant, Anne Thomas-Abbott, a high school teacher who lives in South Knoxville, says the mayor must develop plans "to accommodate a growing population without creating a whole city like West Knoxville."'

And now the first major bit of downtown snobbery. I put up with this for a year or so on K2K until I had to stop participating. There's a stereotype among hard-core Downtowners that anything beyong Sequoya Hills on Kingston Pike is an endless series of strip malls, concrete, and soulless subdivisions full of zombies and Republicans (not necessarily mutually exclusive). While this can be argued in the abstract, the reality is that there are many open spaces, parks, restaurants, theatres and good people that Knoxville should be proud of. A "whole city like West Knoxville" is not a detriment in the way she means it. And this means a lot, coming from a native Fountain Citian who never even travelled any farther west than West Town Mall until after High School.

'"But progress shouldn't come at the expense of historic preservation, cautions Ed Smith, the owner of Knoxville Recycling Co.

"The flavor of our community is our heritage," Smith says. "People don't come here to see new buildings. We need to be very careful what we allow to be destroyed."'

I'm not sure what this is supposed to mean. People only come to Knoxville to see, what, Blount Mansion? The Bakers/Peters house? My great-aunt's old privy? Sure, it's important to preserve what needs to be preserved - places with real history, relevance and architectural distinctiveness. Old Knoxville High has been preserved, as has the old Courthouse and both are still in use when they could have been torn down long ago. However, saving buildings just because they're old is foolish. The Smith/Allen house at Cherokee Country Club is one example - sure, it's a pretty home but it has no particular history behind it other than to certain long-time Knoxville families - but the truth of the matter is they don't own it anymore, and it's in the way of a business' expansion. The same goes for the old building downtown that has longed housed "Pete's" restaurant (who has subsequently vacated, IIRC). It was built by a freed slave a century ago, but that seems to be its only claim to cultural fame and definitely does not have a pleasing architectural style. And it's not what people come to Knoxville to see.

'But a parking shortage, not shoplifters, is what vexes Yee-Haw co-owner Kevin Bradley.

"It's a terrible problem," Bradley says. The shop, which has clients all over the country, couldn't survive by relying on downtown shoppers, says Bradley's partner, Julie Belcher.'

This is absolutely true. I've had to visit downtown a couple times recently for business, and had to drive around and search for parking each time. I don't always have cash or change with me, so it's not always convenient to feed a meter or pay a lot attendent (when you can find an empty one). I don't know what might solve this problem, but I don't agree with those who think bikes and public transportation are the silver bullet keys to easy downtown access.

'"They need to clear out some of the homeless people who scare young women," she says. "I had a guy growl at me this morning."

Downtown residents tend to downplay the safety issue. For example, [Old City business owner Scott] West says that homeless people wouldn't stand out if more visitors crowded the sidewalks."'

This is the quote that almost made me fall out of my chair. Assuming the homeless people will just fade into the background if there are more people downtown is asinine, and an insult to the homeless. The comment would have made more sense if it were concerning rats than the homeless, but apparently he thinks they're fairly equivilant.

And even the analogy's wrong. More people would mean more homeless, and still more people would mean still more homeless. That's not the way to deal with the problem.

On one of those downtown visits last summer I had the occasion to drop my son off at the Y, then had a chance to get some breakfast. I thought about sitting in Market Square to eat, but the overwhelming number of menacing homeless people that apparently live there made me think twice. I ended up eating in my car.

I don't share other peoples' romantic views of the homeless, noble humans who have retreated from every day society. Neither do I consider them rats to be covered up by the rest of humanity. That is one problem I hope the next mayor finds a way to deal with fairly, humanely, and with the dignity all humans deserve.

Next: West Knoxville

Exorcist Wanted. Inquire Within

I came back from the Oak Ridge Playhouse's 60th Anniversary Gala last night, nudged my PC's mouse, and discovered my monitor has been taken over my demons.

All I can see is a dim, glow with barely legible words, and horizontal streaks across the screen like an old RCA with bad reception.

I tried reinstalling the driver, no help. I switched out with my son's monitor, and same thing on his. Apparently something must be hosed with the graphics card (gack!) because I've ruled out cables and the monitor itself.

So anyway, please forgive any mispellings - I can hardly see what I'm typing - and if anyone knows a PC witch doctor who makes house calls, please let me know.

Artsy Pictures of the Dog and Kids

The title pretty much says it all, really.

Click on a picture below for larger version...

Ramona, age 12 weeks	Ramona, age 12 weeks
GiggleGirl and Ramona	BrainyBoy (v7.6) and Ramona

IQ Test

I took the Emode IQ test that Mike Hollihan (welcome back, Mike!) and AlphaPatriot have blogged about.

The results:

Your IQ score is 136

This number is the result of a formula based on how many questions you answered correctly on Emode's Ultimate IQ test. Your IQ score is scientifically accurate; to read more about the science behind our IQ test, click here.

During the test, you answered four different types of questions — mathematical, visual-spatial, linguistic and logical. We analyzed how you did on each of those questions which reveals how your brain uniquely works.

We also compared your answers with others who have taken the test. According to the sorts of questions you got correct, we can tell your Intellectual Type is a Visionary Philosopher.

This means you are highly intelligent and have a powerful mix of skills and insight that can be applied in a variety of different ways. Like Plato, your exceptional math and verbal skills make you very adept at explaining things to others — and at anticipating and predicting patterns. And that's just some of what we know about you from your IQ results.

I remember taking an IQ test when I was in elementary school. I sneaked a peek at the answers when the teacher was out of the room...my number was close to this one.

I also remember seeing the scores of a couple of the other kids in the class - especially a couple of the "slower" ones. One was a 50, and the other just a "--". I didn't know exactly what that meant then, and I wonder what they're doing today....

Ok....your turn!

Madeline Rogero's TV Spot

Somehow, inexplicably, some kids got into the TV studio last night and aired a bogus campaign ad for Knoxville Mayoral candidate Madeline Rogero.

Apparently these ne'er-do-wells put together a video of dubious quality, and ruthlessly satirized the Rogero campaign. The amateurish clips supposedly recreated a "dream sequence" in which Rogero finds herself in Bill Haslam's place (the other candidate for mayor) and she now has the money, family support, and name recognition to run a winning campaign.

The end of the spot showed an unidentified woman sitting up in bed, crying that it was "only a dream!".

It's unknown which juvenile delinquents commandeered the TV spot, but hopefully the fake ad has been replaced by a real one - this time with good quality, discussion of the issues, and featuring the real reasons to vote for her for Mayor.

I sincerely trust these rugrats are severe--- wait a sec...

What's that?

That was the real ad???

Ok, now you're just talking crazy talk. There's no way that ad was actually supposed to air....is there?

Oh, my.....

Volunteer Tailgate Party - Vol. X

Thomas at Newsrack has the latest Volunteer Tailgate Party, a bi-weekly compilation of the best and brightest blatherings of the Rocky Top Brigade.

Thomas has deftly devised a delicious dinner of delectable dishes from the devilishly devious denizens of the RTB.

Dig In!

Americans being Americans

Three Stories

Jeff, the filmmaker blogging as "Sofia Sideshow" from Bulgaria writes of how Americans are perceived by some Eastern Europeans:

"You are a humane people, you know that?"

I do something 'humane,' and burst out laughing.

"What???" I emphasized the extra question marks.

"What I said. You are a humane people. Nobody would do this here."

"...oh somebody..."

"No, Jeff, nobody. You don't have to help me, but you do anyway. You offer to help."

I shrug. She continues.

"You can see it all the time in your country." She started getting self-conscious. "You are humane people, that's all."

"It's...nothing," is all I can say.

She didn't seem to think so."

Read all three stories.

*Shrug* It's just the way we are....

Volunteer Tailgate Party Schedule

I've been meaning to post this for a while now...

If you want to know who's scheduled to host the Volunteer Tailgate Party, go to this link:

http://calendar.yahoo.com/innofthelasthomeinsolace

I've got every date booked through the middle of October. If you want to host one past then, take a look at the dates (every second Thursday) and email me to reserve your spot.

This week it's Thomas at Newsrack - get your cards and letters in to him by this afternoon!

Oh, no, please...continue hitting me on the head with a hammer. Thank you.

Is it just me, or...

• Why do so many blogs and other internet sites feel the need to once again reply and rehash and dig up all the 9/11 stories they can? We all lived through that horrible day, and have lived through the weeks and months of anxiety, depression, and fear that it has caused since then. The images and feelings will never leave my mind, and I'm sure thousands of other Americans. So why do we have to bring all that back up again on the second anniversary?
  
  I don't mean not have tributes, and memorial services and all that. I'm talking about republishing and rereading all those eyewitness accounts, all those first-hand stories and observances don't serve any purpose to me but as a constant punch in the gut, over and over and over again.
  
  When a loved one dies, on the anniversary of their deaths it is customary to remember the day - maybe lay flowers at their grave, or talk about the good times with friends and relatives. Would it be considered healthy and normal to talk again and again about the details of the terrible car crash that took their lives? Or the days and weeks they spent wasting away in a nursing home or ICU Ward? No, I don't think so.
  
  But that's how America, and by extension the blogosphere seems to be dealing with the upcoming second anniversary. Not commemorating the dead, but reviving them - just to watch them die again, over and over and over....
  
  Once was enough for me, thank you.

  
  
  

• Am I the only one who doesn't give a flea-flicker flying fish who's going to be the next governor of California? Yes, it's a large, populous and important state. Yes, it could set a precedent for how our leaders are elected and recalled for years to come. Yes, there's a lot at stake.
  
  But does it have to be in our face every moment of every day, especially all the way across the country in East Tennessee?
  
  Ok, famous actor running for office - check. Interesting, but not really worthy of constant news coverage. But I have no interest in the activist wife of a former Senator, the Lt. Governor who may have racist ties, nor any of the rest of the faded actors/comedians/porn stars that are "running" for office. It's a side show, and if I want to see a side show I'll go to the TVA&I Fair next week.
  
  Well, one thing going for it - the more coverage of this means less 9/11 anniversary coverage and no new terrorist threats. It's sort of like wishing for the heady days of Jonbenet Ramsey, OJ Simpson and Gary Condit coverage....
  

Scooped Again

Library cafe hint of what's to come More (Knoxville News Sentinel: September 2, 2003)

"Programs at the Knox County Library system are perking under the leadership of new director L.J. 'Larry' Frank."

A Curious Man - County's new library director is 'a seeker' (Metropulse: August 28, 2003)

Larry Frank is easy to pick out of a lunchtime crowd at the Tomato Head, a diminutive man in a dark suit and tie, small horizontal-frame glasses, a huge blown-back mane of shoulder-length dark hair and luxuriant mustache, graying just at the edges."

Looks like Jack Neely and the 'Pulse scooped the Sentinel again, this time with its feature on new Knox County Library director Larry Frank.

And I won't comment on the Sentinel leaving an extraneous word in the title of their web article.

Free Advice

Every once in a while, if you live in a house, check your gutters.

Even if you have gutter guards, check your gutters.

I didn't, and spent the better part of yesterday cleaning out several years' worth of accumulated leaves, seeds, shingle leavings, and other things best left unmentioned. The thing is, after a while some of the guards will collapse under the weight of water and whatever, leaving an opening.

Plus we had - at last count - three little trees growing up through the guards. They were cute, till I ripped them out.

Hah. Defy me, will you?

"Future Archeological Find"

In Carl Reiner's new memoir, "An Anecdotal Life," the legendary producer/director relates a story about the time he visited a friend's home in France. His friend was a sculptor named Arman, who had many strange and unusual creations in and around his home. One such sculpture was:

"...A two-ton bronze sculpture of a vintage Citroen auto, so badly pitted that one must surmise it had been dredged up from the ocean's floor. Its title, "Future Archeological Find", suggests that it had been resting there for hundreds of years."

Here's my question: If, hundreds or thousands of years from now archeologists unearth the remains of M. Arman's home, will they deduce that "Future Archeological Find" is:

1. A 20th/21st century automobile unearthed during their own time but brought back in time by Temporal Travelers, or
   
   
2. Due to its advanced age over anything that should exist from this era, evidence that automobiles were in fact invented centuries earlier than the 20th century?
   

I wonder about these things.

Tennessee 24, Fresno State 0, Casey Clausen -6

Well, UT won their season opener against Got-No-Offense State today. A few thoughts from one of the 103,000 in attendance:

• Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
  
  That was me laughing at all the people in the sun all day long, while I was in the nice breeze and shade of the row 54 in Z12 ("in the dry"). Ok, sorry, that's my one and only snide comment for the whole year. Back to being nice....
  
  
• Casey Clausen looked like...well, he didn't look like a leader, and he certainly didn't look like a senior today. He was innefective on long passes, was off target on several others and threw two incredibly (potentially) costly interceptions. I haven't seen the TV coverage, so I couldn't see his face very well but he looked to me like a guy with something other than football on his mind. Never mind first-game jitters, the heat, the sun, new receivers and all that - he never seemed focused on the game, and played like his mind was somewhere else. I've known people to play ball, while at the same time trying to deal with personal problems. It definitely affects your concentration and decision-making, and that's what he looked like today. I may be way off base, but that's what it looked like to me.
  
  Oh, and if I were the defense, I'd duct tape him to the goalposts overnight for blowing their shutout with that ill-advised and ill-timed interception returned for a TD.
  
  
• Welcome back, UT Running Game. After taking a vacation last year, it was nice to finally have more than one tailback show some results. Unless I miss my guess, the tandem of Houston, Davis, Riggs, Larkin and co could be as special as Garner/Stewart/Hayden in the early 90's. And that may be what our offense has to count on this year. That's ok, plenty of championships have been won with superior running games.
  
  
• While I thought it was good that starting kickoff man Phillip Newman was lifted and replaced by JC transfer Fusco (who did a great job in relief), in fairness to Newman, his two kickoffs were 1) The very first kick of the season, which went out of bounds - I can forgive almost every player on the team who flubs their first play from scrimmage), and 2) A squibber that was taken by an upback and returned to FS's 45. He had to kick from the 20 due to a penalty on the previous touchdown, and that can screw up any kicker's rythem. If Fusco can continue to kick like he did today, he should have the job, but give Newman another look at placekicking....because there - well, as Tootie always said, "We're in trou-bllllllllllllllllllllllllllllle!"
  
  
• Did FS really not Pass Interferere on our first offensive series near the goalline? And did we realy miss that second field goal attempt?
  
  
• I liked members of the Vol Booster club greeting people as we went in. If this is another of new A.D. Mike Hamilton's ideas, score another one for him.
  
  
• Dumbest Big Orange Tradition that Everybody Loves:
  "We urge you, to pay these prices...and please pay no more!!"
  
  
• Dumbest Big Orange Tradition that Probably Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time But Now Seems to be Thankfully Gone:
  Reciting General Neyland's "Maxims" before the game.
  
  
• Classiest Big Orange Tradition that I'm Probably the Only One in the Stadium that Appreciates:
  The Marching Band playing the opposing team's fight song in the pregame show. I've liked this ever since I spent my three years in the Pride of the Southland band back in the mid-80's. It's just classy.
  
  
• Newest Big Orange Concession (To Me):
  Italian Ice. Is this the first time it's been available, or did I just miss it last year? Along with the Petros, the North End zone has an eclectic food menu.
  
  Next year: sushi!
  
  
• Prediction: The Vanderbilt game this year will be the highest attended game in history at Neyland Stadium. Reason? You have a one-in-107.000 chance of walking away with a truck, a boat, and Running through the "T" before the game as the 25,000,000th fan to visit the stadium. Speaking as one who's actually helped form the "T" for three years, there's nothing like it.
  
  Question: What would happen if the mythical 25,000,000th fan is a Vandy fan? My advice for Vandy fans coming to the game (all 3 of you, that is) is wear a UT shirt to the game and change after you get inside the gates.
  

Well, that's it for now. Next week: Marshall, 45-21 winner today over Bill Cosby's nemesis Hofstra.

Happy Blogiversary!

SayUncle's site is one year old!

Funny, he doesn't look a day over 6 months...

IT'S FOOTBALL TIME IN TENNESSEE!!!

Score Prediction
Tennessee: 16
Fresno State: 14

Pulse of the 'Pulse

Comments on the passing scene in this week's Metropulse

• A Curious Man - County's new library director is 'a seeker'
  

  ""Life is a constant exploration." He adds, smiling, "That's why I'm in Knoxville."

  I think I'm going to like Larry Frank. He sounds like just what Knox County needs to shake things up a bit. That is, if isn't run out on a rail first.

  
  
  
  

• Seven Days
  
  

  "Saturday, August 23 - The Associated Press reveals that the future of Tennessee Meiji Gakuin, the only high school for Japanese students in the state, is threatened by declining student population since September 11. Naturally, Japanese parents are timid about sending their kids into the internationally acknowledged terrorist target of Sweetwater.

  I was sitting at the bar at OCI on the strip this afternoon having lunch, and happened to laugh out loud when I read this entry...
  
  GUY BEHIND THE BAR: (filling my tea) Something funny in the paper?
  
  ME: Yeah, I was reading this - supposedly they're closing the only Japanese high school in Tennessee, and apparently their population has gone down since 9/11, and the "Japanese parents are timid about sending their kids into the internationally acknowledged terrorist target of Sweetwater"...
  
  GUY BEHIND THE BAR: (a couple moments of silence, staring at me) Terrorists...
  
  ME: Yeah, well, as if out in Sweetwater...
  
  GUY BEHIND THE BAR: (wanders off)
  
  ME: *sigh*

  
  
  
  

• Air Wars
  

  "...the Rogero arsenal has what many consider a Weapon of Mass Destruction in the person of writer/producer/director Tom Jester.
  
  [...]
  
  He generally gets top dollar for his services, and says he had "a meeting" with Haslam and his campaign manager Bill Lyons, but felt committed to work for Rogero. "The Haslams couldn't afford me," he jokes."

  It's nice to know some people in this county can't be bought, and aren't awed by the might power of the Haslam gas pump. Maybe he can come up with a good, subtle, well-placed ad that will knock the other side's ads on their knees. However, I also hope it takes the high road and doesn't sling mud. I've seen Haslam's ads, and well...they're innocent enough - family man, pillar of the community, beneficiary of nepotism, that sort of thing. It's too innocent for me though - they might as well shown him kissing a baby or helping an old lady across the street.

  
  
  
  

• The Restrained Campaign - Political points made too polite
  

  "The point is, once upon a time in America, political campaigns were spectacles. They were epic battles for the honor of representing fellow citizens in a government for the beagles, by the steeple, and of the people.

  If we had a government for the beagles, then my dog would be the President and she'd bark incessantly, whine when she doesn't get her way, and poop all over the White House.
  
  [INSERT YOUR OWN "AND THIS WOULD BE DIFFERENT THAN THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION....HOW?" JOKE HERE]
  

All Right, Who Moved the Commandments?

I could have sworn they were here a minute ago. What's going on?

Ok, guys, quit fooling around and find the Commandments. Cute, very cute.

Kids today...

Say It Ain't So, Jim!

Lileks to quit Bleating?

(Doubtless this will make some people very happy...)

But no, looks like he's moving to...well, that would be telling. Go read and find out GnatDaddy's latest career move....

UPDATE: Yes, I know the link to Rush's site is wrong. He doesn't need the traffic, remember? He's swimming in faithful followers.... You get the point, though.

Typical

The Knoxville News Sentinel's online poll sez:

Do you agree with the judge's decision to have the monument removed?

And the survey says (as of 4:30pm EDT 8/27/03) ....

SURVEY RESULTS
(1) Yes - 33.8 % (73)
(2) No - 65.3 % (141)
(3) Not sure - 0.9 % (2)

Not surprising. 65% of Knoxnews.com visitors who bothered to take the poll don't understand the 1st amendment. I'd say about the same number don't understand the 2nd one, either.

UPDATE:Wow. What a difference a day makes...

And the (updated) survey says (as of 3:10pm EDT 8/28/03) ....

SURVEY RESULTS
(1) Yes - 47.8 % (229)
(2) No - 51.8 % (248)
(3) Not sure - 0.4 % (2)

Ballot-stuffing? Not by me. Interesting and developing....

It Might Be! It Could Be!

Cubs' days as lovable losers are over

"Their young starting pitching is that good, their farm system that deep, their resources that vast. New manager Dusty Baker is rapidly eroding a tradition of failure that dates back nearly a century. General manager Jim Hendry, who took over little more than a year ago, is showing the moxie necessary to shake a franchise out of its doldrums. Put it all together, and Cardinals GM Walt Jocketty says of the Cubs, "They're always going to be there."

When Knoxville cable first starting carrying WGN-TV from Chicago lo these many moons ago, I stopped watching the Braves and started following the Cubs. Jody Davis, the Sarge: Gary Matthews, Ron Cey, Shawon Dunston, Rick Sutcliffe, Andre Dawson and of course Harry Carey and Steve Stone were great ways to pass the time after school. I remember my favorite game that I saw - I don't remember who they were playing, but they came back from an 8-run deficit with a 9-run 9th inning to win it. Thrilling.

While since then I've returned to the Braves as my favorite team, the Cubbies still hold a special place for me in the Baseball pantheon. Looks like they're doing well this year, and could progress in the playoffs.

Plus, I just wanted to remind everyone of my prediction I made on opening day (lest you forget).

Oh, and Kevin thinks this may be a sign of the End Times. Let's hope not.

Making the swamp?

Words matter. Often

Joshua Marshall of Talking Points Memo writes:

"Look at the difference thus far between Afghanistan and Iraq. In the first place, we drained the swamp. In the second, we've made the swamp. "

I'm puzzled. Does Joshua actually think this "swamp" did not exist in Iraq before the invasion?

From all of the reports that I've seen, the "resistance" fighters who are continuing to harass our troops are either: a) former Ba'ath party members left over from Saddam's regime, or b) Islamic terrorists who've entered from neighboring countries to fight (or c) mercenaries, in which all bets are off).

The difference between this "swamp" and the former Afghan "swamp", however, is that terrorists were able to camp, train, hang out and watch The Sopranos via satellite at the various training compounds in Afghanistan. It really was a breeding ground for terrorists, as the Taliban actively supported the creation of training camps while working with (or for) Osama Bin Laden.

Now, there is good evidence that similar type camps were operating in Iraq with Saddam's blessing before the invasion; although it hasn't been proven beyond the proverbial shadow of a doubt, there is really actual doubt that it was so. I tend to doubt they exist anymore, except possibly in small pockets, but to the extent they were in Afghanistan? Probably not.

So is there a "swamp" in Iraq? You could probably call it that, but it's a little one, we didn't create it (in fact, we helped drain it), and it will only get smaller.

Line Item Principles

Polite Society

"But I am difficult to label politically. I am pro-gun, for gay rights, anti-death penalty, anti-tax, anti-big government, think abortion should be legal, think responsibility should lie with the people, think civil liberties should never be threatened, but I still see the need for government monitoring of certain things. So, I don’t fit in really with most Democrats or Republicans (or Libertarians for that matter).

(This is from fellow Rocky Top Brigadier SayUncle's site.)

I wish more people would have the courage to admit they have opinions and beliefs in subjects that may contradict or agree with "traditional" political platform topics all across the board.

I think it's short-sighted to assume that, if you're a liberal you must be: a) pro-choice, b) for bigger government, c) higher taxes, d) open immigration, e) gun control, f) environmentalism, etc and if you are a conservative you must be a) pro-death penalty, b) more religion in the schools, c) for a bigger military, d) pro-big business, e) anti-welfare, f) anti-gay, etc.

I, like SayUncle, look at each issue and make our own choices - not based on what each group is "supposed" to support, but where your heart and mind tell you is right.

This, of course, is anathema to party leaders - how else to keep the converted in line, and to bring more into the fold - than to do their thinking for them. Are you pro-choice? Want to be politically active? Join the Democratic Party - and, oh, by the way - here's what else we believe...we've done all the thinking for you, no need to worry about deciding for yourself, just follow the scorecard. Hate big government? The Republicans are for you! And while you're at it, light that cross in that yard over there, if you don't mind...we'll let you know the rest of the bylaws later.

Thanks, SayUncle, for being your own person. I hope more people can do the same thing.

Maybe that's something good blogs can do as the concept evolves - move away from the Freeper and IndyMedia mindset, and discuss/debate the issues as issues, not political pawns.

Volunteer Tailgate Party - Vol. IX

Manish at Damn Foreigner has the latest Volunteer Tailgate Party, a bi-weekly compilation of the best and brightest blatherings of the Rocky Top Brigade.

Manny has put together a cornocopia of collectible, carefully crafted creations from the cream of the columnist crop!

Commence!

Bloggerview

One of the RTB's newest members, Queen Medb's Castle, has deigned to shower her grace down upon me, and offer up five interview questions for me to answer in front of God, John Ashcroft, the New York Mets, and the rest of the world.

Part of the rules is that I will do the same next Friday to whoever leaves a comment that says "interview me". So, please, feel free!

*Rules, as laid down thruout history:
1. If you want to participate, leave a comment saying "interview me." I will respond by asking you five questions (not the same as you see here).
2. You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions. (Kindly leave me a comment telling me that you have!)
3. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
4. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions. (Not the same as mine, of course.)
Anyway, here we go:

1) Are you interested in guns, and if so what gun would you most like to own?
Oy vey, vhat a loaded qvestion.....;) Ok, SayUncle and others, just plug your ears and go, "la la la la - I'm not listening!!!"

I hate guns. I loathe guns. I appreciate their usefulness in the professions of law enforcement, security, and the military, but I fail to grasp the slightest hint why anyone would feel proud to own one. I don't see why anyone (outside of above jobs) would see the need to carry one concealed on their person. I don't think the statistics of successful defense of one's home against unlawful encursion outweigh the risks to accidental discharge by a child finding one in their parent's bedside table.

I believe the 2nd amendment provides for allowing guns in use of a state militia, meaning a National Guard. I don't see how it can be interpreted to say it allows private citizens to own guns and keep them in their homes for their own personal protection or other purposes.

I don't derive any pleasure from the thought of hunting. Going out to deliberately shoot deer, rabbit, quail, ducks, etc turns my stomach. I understand many people eat what they catch, but it's not a survival necessity today.

Guns are not glamorous. Guns are not a symbol of status, guns are not bats/knives/javelins/hammers/golf clubs - each of those weapons have different primary purposes.

The one and only use of a gun is to injure or take the life of another human being or animal, and leaves no room for second thoughts.

Does that answer your question? :)


2) Lake, river or ocean?
I remember growing up here in East Tennessee, on a Monday morning in school everyone would say they went "to the lake" for the weekend. Just which lake in particular was rarely specified, but supposedly there was a lot to do "at the lake". I never went "to the lake", so I have no idea what the big deal was - partying in a houseboat? Waterskiiing? Picnicing? Well, we did that too, but never "at the lake". Hm.

Similarly with rivers, we have the big Tennessee River that oozes through Knoxville - it gets wide enough to be called Fort Loudon Lake as it runs through downtown (could that be the "lake" they were referring to? Naah, not unless you wanted to dodge carp while waterskiing and risk growing a third arm). I've only ridden on personal boats a few times down the river - it was fun, and I'd like to own a boat someday.

But, the ocean...*ahh*. I love the ocean - and I'm not necessarily talking about what's out off the Panama City Beach coast (where I got stung by a jellyfish when I was 12), but the Ocean. My wife and I went Carnival Cruising on the Paradise last fall for our 10th annualversity, and snorkeled in St. John's, kayaked and swam with sea turtles off the coast of Barbados, and explored the black sandy beaches of St. Lucia. I saw the northern coast of Cuba ("Yoo hoo....Fidel!! Over here! Yoo hoo!!!!) and watched a rainbow on one side of the ship while a waterspout menaced the other side.

The Ocean. Definitely.


3) If you could have any magical/mystical/superhero power, what would it be?
That's a great question. When considering the myriad of superpowers of all the superheroes I can think of from DC and Marvel Comics, there are so many great ones to choose from: Super Speed (my hero is, and always has been the original modern Flash, Barry Allen), elasticity (Mr. Fantastic, The Elongated Man), invisibility (The Invisible Girl), power ring (Green Lantern), and ice power (Captain Cold, Mr. Freeze - ok, they're villains - and Ice Man).

But the best is in the basics as they say, and when it comes right down to it the absolute best superpower anyone could ever have is:

Flight. Definitely.


4) How much cash money is in your wallet/pocket right now?

What, are you going to hit me up for a loan?

I had about $6 in ones, then I knew we were going swimming with some friends this evening and going to order pizza so I got out another $30. I used $10 of it for the pizza, so now I guess I have $26.

What the heck kind of question is that? :)


5) If you could be famous for something, what would you like to be?
I would like to be famous for being the Father of one of my children who just did something wonderful - found a cure for cancer, achieved world peace, that sort of thing.

Barring that, I'd like to be famous in a small circle of people for being a very good Theatrical Director.


That's it - Thanks, Your Majesty!

The Magical Patriot Tour!

Ashcroft Kicks Off Patriot Act Campaign

"Ashcroft's speech marked the start of a campaign-style offensive aimed at countering criticism from leading Democrats and civil liberties advocates about the Patriot Act. He plans a road trip Wednesday and Thursday, with remarks to law enforcement audiences in Philadelphia, Cleveland, Detroit and Des Moines, Iowa.

Among the dozen or so future stops are Salt Lake City and Boston, officials said.

My crack ace gully dwarf reporter staff has unearthed the heretofore secret Patriot Act Campaign Theme Song. Many gully dwarfs were killed, arrested, imprisoned, or wandered off relaying this information back to us:

The Magical Patriot Tour

[Shut up! Shut up for the Magical Patriot Tour! Step right this way!]

Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up...
(WE'RE FIGHTING IMMIGRATION)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up...
(AND SPYING ON OUR NATION)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.
The Magical Patriot Tour is waiting to take you away,
Waiting to take you away.

Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up..
(WE KNOW EVERYTHING YOU KNOW)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up
(AND WE'LL SEE YOU IN GITMO)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.
The Magical Patriot Tour is hoping to take you away,
Hoping to take you away.

Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up, shut up - it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up...
(WE DON'T TRUST NATURALIZATION)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.
Shut up...
(OR VOTER REGISTRATION)
Shut up it's the Patriot Tour.

The Magical Patriot Tour is coming to take you away,
Coming to take you away.
The Magical Patriot Tour is dying to take you away,
Dying to take you away, take you today...

Fair Cassidy and the Balanced Kid

Paul Newman Is Still HUD By PAUL NEWMAN

"The Fox News Network is suing Al Franken, the political satirist, for using the phrase "fair and balanced" in the title of his new book. In claiming trademark violation, Fox sets a noble example for standing firm against whatever.

Unreliable sources report that the Fox suit has inspired Paul Newman, the actor, to file a similar suit in federal court against the Department of Housing and Urban Development, commonly called HUD. Mr. Newman claims piracy of personality and copycat infringement.

In the 1963 film "HUD," for which Mr. Newman was nominated for an Academy Award, the ad campaign was based on the slogan, "Paul Newman is HUD."

This is too funny. Patricia Neal, in town this week for the Patricia Neal Rehabilitation Center Golf Classic and the Covenant Platinum Awards received an Academy Award for HUD as well.

The last paragraph is the kicker:

"A coalition of the willing — i.e., the Bratwurst Asphalt Company and the Ypsilanti Hot Dog and Bean Shop — has been pushed forward and is prepared to label its products "fair and balanced," knowing that Fox News will sue and that its newscasters will be so tied up with subpoenas they will only be able to broadcast from the courtroom, where they will be seen tearing their hair and whining, looking anything but fair and balanced, which would certainly be jolly good sport all around."

Way to go, Butch!

Dream Come True, for Some

Y bother: men are doomed after all

"MEN are doomed to extinction, victims of the decaying human Y-chromosome, the only piece of DNA men possess and women do not. So says Bryan Sykes, professor of human genetics at Oxford University, in a book that envisages the "Sapphic reproduction" of women by genetic manipulation.

[...]

His strategy for perpetuating a new female race depends on tweaking the proven technique of injecting sperm into eggs. Instead, the nucleus from a second egg would be injected.

The only difference from any other birth would be that the baby would always be a girl. "The entire process has been accomplished without sperm, without Y-chromosomes and without men," Professor Sykes says."

There's an Ann Coulter joke in there just waiting to get out. I'll let you know when I find it.

(Hat tip to Resonance)

Bill O'Reilly - Does Anyone Still Care?

Calling Al Franken a satirist is a farce

It is simply a sorry joke to see a political activist like Al Franken labeled a satirist by The New York Times. Attempting to smear and destroy the reputations of those with whom you politically disagree is not satire. If that were the case, Richard Nixon's Watergate plumbers would all be writing for "Saturday Night Live."

Now we see you're true motivations, Bill. All your life you wanted to be a comedy and satire writer, but were never taken seriously. Now it's come down to this.

Reminds me of the old X-Files episode: "Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man". The CSM is the main villian of the show, but in a speculative/flashback episode, he is shown to moonlight as a writer. His submissions to various magazines go ignored all his life, and he finally realizes he is actually a hack after all and goes after all those who show creativity and insight.

Bill, CSM. CSM, Bill.

Rocky Top Brigade Update

Welcome to new members: Long Pauses, My Quiet Life, Rebel Yell, Queen Medb's Castle, and Forkum of Cox and Forkum.

Also, BusyMom has moved to http://busymom.net/. Adjusteth thy linketh accordingly.

Unfair

I had to rebuild the whole code for my site last night - apparently I lost internet connection in the middle of a save or something, and all that was left was the top half of the page of code. I hadn't uploaded it, so the blog didn't actually go down, but I couldn't do an update.

Well, I found some old copies of the code and fixed it - all except for the permalink code. Would someone be so kind as to email me the Blogger permalink code?

Thanks!

UPDATE: Thank you, Danielle!

Balanced

Nicholas Kristof of the New York Times apparently believes a belief in the Virgin Mary -- by Christians and non-Christians -- is a firm step down the road to becoming an American Taliban.

I just find it interesting that he's concerned about believing in the Virgin Birth is a shift toward "mysticism", but doesn't reference the Resurrection as such.

Surely the Resurrection is more "mystical" than a Virgin Birth? How intellectual is coming back from the dead?

I was also confused by some of his numbers:

"Americans are three times as likely to believe in the Virgin Birth of Jesus (83 percent) as in evolution (28 percent).

(...)

America is so pious that not only do 91 percent of Christians say they believe in the Virgin Birth, but so do an astonishing 47 percent of U.S. non-Christians."

Do those numbers add up? I'm no statistician, but they seem off to me. 83% of all Americans believe in the Virgin Birth - comprising 91% of the Christians and 47% of Non-Christians. Maybe I'd need to know an actual % of Americans who are Christians to understand.

Also..

"...Because most Biblical scholars regard the evidence for the Virgin Birth [...] as so shaky that it pretty much has to be a leap of faith."

He expects us to believe at least 51% percent of Biblical "scholars" believe the Virgin Birth is a myth? What defines a Biblical "scholar", anyway? He cites two and only two theologians as reference.

Passing off a conviction as convential wisdom (i.e. "most Biblical scholars") without providing real evidence to this belief is disingenious. And it's a popular tactic these days, by a lot of people - on and offline.

Thanks for Bill Hobbs for the link, plus Donald Sensing and Rod Dreher have more.

Blount County Loses Power

For some reason, a lot of Blount County has lost power, although Mcghee Tyson Airport does not seem to be affected.

My office is nearby, but all seems okay for th--


UPDATE: Your outpouring of support and concern is overwhelming...

Fair

While others attack the idiocy of this issue with scathing satire, I'll go a different direction.



Don't forget the Tennessee Valley Fair opens September 5th and runs through the 14th.

The fair's been a fixture of Knoxville and East Tennessee culture for years upon decades upon centuries -- I think when settlers first moved into the Tennessee Valley, they discovered Cherokees engaged in Horse-Pull competitions over in what would become Chilhowee Park.

A little known fact is that when the settlers first began bartering with the Indians in this area, the natives introduced a strange, tubular shaped vegetable known as a foon. They would cook it (mixed with some animal fat) and leave it out in the sun to dry. The Tennessee settlers considered the foon a delicacy and traded for it in great numbers. Often cooked to a golden brown, the foon had a dry, crispy quality that was delicious - but it wasn't until Ms. Nell Keck, the wife of one of the areas early governors, arrived that it began to achieve a lasting popularity. Ms. Keck had brought with her from her native Scotland a collection of sugars and other sweeteners (at her husband's great expense, of course) and one autumn night at a harvest festival a local Indian leader cooked up a batch of foon to bring to the celebration. Legend has it that Ms. Keck sampled the foon, found it to her liking but a bit dry, and proceeded to add some of her sugared flavoring. The result was a hit, and the new confection - from then on called a Foon-nell keck has been an East Tennesee tradition. It has been served at autumn harvest festivals ever since.

More about the Fair later...

Today is Fair and Balanced Day

Let the festivities begin.

Oops

Ok, it's my fault. I plugged in my cell phone to recharge, and looks like I brought down the entire Northeast Power Grid. Sorry! My bad! Won't happen again...

Actually, I'm reminded of the guy from Airplane!, who, when all the power goes out at the airport just as the plane's about to land, is discovered lurking by a control panel with the unplugged power cord in his hand: "Just kidding!"

The first thing that occured to me was that with all the people streaming out into the streets of Manhatten, they would be sitting ducks - exposed, out in the open, slightly confused, and vulnerable to a chemical or biological attack.

Second, as I watched them walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, I wondered how many were on the bridge at one time, if (plus the cars) it was more than normal. Another image of sitting ducks.

Similarly, I saw them boarding the Staten Island Ferry en masse, and remembered the ferry boat warnings from earlier this month.

Finally, would it be easier for someone to smuggle something into the city or the country under cover of nonpowered darkness?

I hate how paranoid I've become, and I hate how unsafe I feel.

Friday is Fair And Balanced Day on the Internet

Save Al Franken!

"Yes. This Friday, August 15, is Fair And Balanced day on the Internet. You are all hereby instructed to use the words Fair And Balanced in very creative ways on your various websites."

Ok, you've heard the call - so will you strike a blow for non-censorship and tort reform everywhere???

Hot on the Trail

The new audit report detailing formet UT President John Shumaker's misdeeds has been released - you can snag it here:

http://web.knoxnews.com/web/kns/images/pdf/utauditreport.pdf

Tas, Come Home

We returned this evening from a pool party to see our big, white cat Tas scurrying off around the side of the house. We don't know how he got out, but now he's gone and we can't find him.

Be safe, Tas, and come back tomorrow...

QUICKEST UPDATE IN BLOG HISTORY: He's Back! I went outside to check his food bowl that I left for him, and heard him meowing next to the side of the house. A little dirty, but unharmed. The ka-tet remains unaltered.

Of course, I also just discovered we have a basketball-size hornet's nest in our backyard. But that's another story.

Catching Up

Some Bits and Pieces....

• A Spammer gets Scammed - Jim "Rant-Man" MacQuarrie takes one of those "Nigerian Prince with $35 Million I Need To Transfer Out - Fast!" Spammers and runs his own scam right back at him. Read Parts One, Two, and finally Three. It's refreshing to see one of these lowlifes get taken....
  
  
• Pupdate - Little Ramona is growing, noticably larger than in the pictures below. However, one thing is blisteringly obvious: cats are easier to housetrain. Let's just end it there.
  
  
• The Party has Moved On - Michael Totten has some interesting analysis of what's happened to the Democratic party. I touched on this topic some months ago, essentially saying that Democrats have moved from being liberal to Leftists. Someone needs to get a strong rope and pull it w-a-a-a-a-a-y back toward the center. Thanks, Michael.
  
  
• Distractions.... - Wednesday night Ah-nold announced his candidacy, and I was at Barley's Tap House watching my bro play some tunes (you did go, didn't you? Didn't you??? Grr...) Anyway, on the TV above the bar FoxNews (motto: We've Dropped "Crazy Like A..." from our title - and passed the savings on to you!) was broadcasting the event ad nauseum. Finally the pundits got into the act. It's Matt Drudge - in all his ill-fitting Panama-hatted glory! (Does that guy ever look like he's more than half-awake? He looks like Mandy Patinkin on Prozac).
  
  Who's that? Sean Hannity, of Hannity and Colmes - *snore*. Does he still have on of those Not Rush radio shows? You know, there's Rush, and then everybody else who's Not Rush. Hard to tell them all apart.
  
  Oh, good - there's Geraldo, drawing technical schematics for the T-1000 unit in the sand. What happened to your MSNBC gig, Gerry? Weren't there any openings on the pork-bellies futures desk at CNBC? Oh, I hear Animal Plane's hiring for a new reality series about treasure hunters who go out after nonexistant treasures - it's called Crock Files.
  
  Finally...oh, wait...it's - it's - Ann Coulter! She seems to be alluding to Ah-nuld's being married to a Kennedy automatically makes him a liberal and a traitor. In fact, anyone who's ever seen one of his movies is a traitor! You're all traitors! Ah-hahahahah!!!! (runs out in a screaming, frothing frenzy as her head explodes).
  
  Oh, yeah - there's music here. *applause applause* - "Free Bird!!!"
  
  UPDATE: Oh yeah...
  
  
• I've added a new feature to my site - What I'm Doing. It's up there in the top right, and I'll be listing whatever books, audiotapes and/or DVD's I'm watching right now. I've also become one of those Amazon Associates, so each of the titles has a link to their info/purchase pages on Amazon. If you buy it through that link, I get a small percentage! So, like, buy stuff...
  
  

Volunteer Tailgate Party - Vol. VIII

Deb at Sugarfused has the latest Volunteer Tailgate Party, a bi-weekly compilation of the best and brightest blatherings of the Rocky Top Brigade.

Deb has put together a plethora of pithy posts to peruse, ponder, and pontificate upon.

Proceed!

Acceptable Losses?

Girl, 15, killed by shotgun discharged by brother, 11

"A 15-year-old girl died Monday night when her 11-year-old brother shot her with a shotgun in their Northwest Knox County home, authorities said."

"At this point it looks accidental," Knox County Sheriff's Office spokeswoman Martha Dooley said late Monday. "

I'm thinking that I can see ten stories like this for every one where a gun was successfully used in thwarting a burglary or other attack.

So, ten kids killed, ten more lives ruined by the ones who pulled the trigger. Is it worth it?

UPDATE: SayUncle has some good discussions in the Comments. Trouble is, as evidenced by the title of my post, the relatively low number of children's deaths/year by guns is misleading. It's not the number of deaths, but that there are deaths at all. The key phrase here is relatively low number - there's no relativity about it. The fact that even one child has been killed due to a combination of their own curiosity, their parent's negligence in proper safety training and home safeguarding and the fact that the gun exists in the home at all is an unacceptable loss.

He's Ba-a-a-a-a-a-ck....

Well, just when I thought he wasn't going to darken our door again, the lone gunslinger returns to town.

Yeah, my pesky little brother has come back home for a couple of days.

He seems to think he can, like, sing or something. Well, we've humored him for all these years - it's kind of a habit, so I'll just keep doing it. Y'know, that brother...thing. Whatever.

Anyhooo....he'll be at Barley's Tap House in the Old City (that's in Knoxville for those of you connecting from, say, Equatorial Guinea) Wednesday, August 6 at 9pm. If you like this style of music, came take a listen.



Seriously, though, he's good. Really good.

OH, crap - he reads this sometimes....now I'm screwed - I've been nice to him, and it's in print and like, official and everything. I'll have to think of something mean to do to him to make up for it. Anyone got any tomatoes?

One Version of the Story

Free Speech News brings to our attention this story about Qusay Hussein's son, Mustafa, who was killed in the raid that killed his father and uncle Uday. It was written by Lisa Walsh Thomas of Unknownnews.net:

Mustafa Hussein: Genesis of a legend

"The four people in the villa, who defended themselves with only small arms for approximately four hours, included an aide to one of the brothers and Qusay's 14-year old son, Mustafa."

...

"But, according to information available as of July 27,[...] 14-year old Mustafa, grandson to Saddam Hussein, held off eighty or more soldiers until he too was finally overcome and shot to death.

...

"There is surely a devastated mother somewhere, a best friend, a girl who had caught her breath once upon speaking with the teenager. Maybe it will come out that there are keepsakes, first shoes, a lucky soccer ball, a piece of artwork from a child artist. That we have to leave to the movies. OR to those who preserve all they can of their heroes. "

...

"Whereas Saddam, Uday, and Qusay — unless they have been demonized out of any semblance to truth — were cruel to their own people, young Mustafa is probably squeaky clean. We don't yet know, but it could be difficult for those forces against Iraqi insurgence to convincingly paint any fourteen year old as 'evil.'"

It's interesting to read some insight into the life of this 14-year-old boy (I've blogged about him here and here), although I'm not certain of the veracity of the sources Ms. Thomas cites (and she doesn't identify them). She paints Mustafa with a fairly glowing brush, of what was, and what could have been.

I sincerely hope that he was a young man thrust into a deadly situation, but had not yet risen (or sunk) to the levels of evil of his father, uncle, or grandfather. I hope this, yet I do not feel it is likely. It would be nice to believe he had a lucky soccer ball, or a girlfriend, but it seems more likely to me that he had a lucky AK-47 and was preparing to follow in his family's traditional treatment of women. I may be wrong - I hope so - but I would love to know of more verifiable accounts.

Read the whole thing. I don't think I agree with a number of the facts presented, simply because they're unverified or hearsay, but it's definitely thought-provoking.

Rocky Top Welcome

Welcome to the newest members of the Rocky Top Brigade: Opinari, Dreams of Flying Fish, Bugly, and my homegirl (also known as "The ChickDimwit Across The Hall") Teresa at HATamaran.

Don't be scared - just talk slowly and quietly and most of the other RTB members won't spook too easily....

This Just In...

Doctors' handwriting frequently not legible

"Because pharmacists throughout the country struggle to read illegible prescription orders, some states are making illegibility illegal."

Nothing says "jailhouse reputation" better than being in the Big House on an illegalegibility rap.

In other news: the sky is blue, water is wet, I'm Chevy Chase and you're not.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Kevin, What Are You Doing With That Tape Recorder? Nothing, Mom...(snicker)

'Saddam' Mourns Sons in New Audiotape

"A man purporting to be Saddam Hussein (search) acknowledged the death of his sons in an audiotape broadcast Tuesday on Al-Arabiya television, saying they had been 'martyred for Iraq' and that America will be defeated."

...

"'Even if Saddam Hussein has 100 children other than Uday and Qusay, Saddam Hussein would offer them the same way,' the speaker said on the tape."

Well, I know I refer to myself in the third person all the time. I was just saying to my wife the other day, "You know, dear, Barry would like to mow the yard, but due to the impending demise of thousands of innocent bugs, Barry has decided to stay inside and take a nap..."

"The voice on the tape, which was monitored in Cairo, said it was recorded July 2003, but the exact date was not clear."

The fantastic new state-of-the-art audiotape dating techniques are truly fascinating. I mean, it hasn't been too long since we were only guessing at the year of a recording - now it's down to the month! Amazing...

"There was no immediate verification that the voice on the tape was, in fact, Saddam. But U.S. officials said the voice sounded like the deposed Iraqi leader."

Well, they convinced me. You know, I do a pretty good Kermit the Frog impression - I'll bet I could tape myself and people would think Jim Henson had come back to life.

"The last audio recording attributed to Saddam was broadcast by Al-Arabiya on July 23 and claimed to have been recorded July 20. U.S. intelligence officials said it was probably authentic.

"Sir, we've fully analyzed this tape and have come to the careful conclusion that it's could actually be the real deal".

"Are you sure of your analysis?"

"Yes sir, it's probably authentic."

"Good enough for me!"

"The other recording said Saddam was speaking on July 14 and referred to the new Governing Council of Iraq. U.S. intelligence officials said that recording also was probably authentic and was further evidence that Saddam survived the war."

Wow, this "probably authentic" meme really gets around. That must be the same department that determines whether politicians' tax returns are "probably authentic".

Seriously, though, I think there's some 14-year-old kid with an old Panasonic tape recorder disguising his voice as Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden and mailing tapes to Al-Arabiya television, Al-Jezeera, Al-Delgreco and whoever else will play them. Right now he's sitting eating a bag of Doritos and laughing his head off...

Another Blogspot Defection

Michael Totten has moved offsite to http://michaeltotten.com/. Adjust your links accordingly.

Bark bark bark Yip yip yip whiiiiiiiiiiinnee bark bark bark yip bark yip whiiiiiiiiiiine bark bark bark yip yip bark bark....

Make it s-t-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-p!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pictures...oh, We've Got Pictures!

Well, we named her - I think. Ramona, from the Beverly Cleary children's books my son loves me to read to him. Click on a picture below for larger version...

Ramona, age 6 weeks

GiggleGirl and Ramona

BrainyBoy (v7.5) and Ramona

Oh My, What Have We Gotten Ourselves Into?

So the familial unit is out tooling the highway and byways of Knox County this afternoon, soaking up some sun, seein' the sights. We go through downtown so GiggleGirl can see the "Sunspear". Hang a Ralph to travel down Chapman Highway (also known as the Highway of Doom(tm)) and pass all the lovely strip malls and mom&pop tattoo parlors. If you keep driving Chapman to its para-logical conclusion, you run smack-dab into Sevierville, gateway to Pigeon Forge, Gatlinburg, and the Great Smoky Mountains beyond.

But wait! We're not headed that far today, our destination is a bit closer in - the bustling metropolis of Seymour, TN. What's in Seymour, TN this fine Saturday afternoon in June that could attract a family of four in the proverbial RugRat Chariot? Baseball game? Nope. Cookout? Guess again, Chester. We're headed for the parking lot of a little church near Wendy's. You see, GiggleGirl's daycare teacher (soon to be unemployed, see previous rants) seems to have something she needs to get taken off her and her family's hands. Several somethings, actually, and they wiggle, bark, whimper and poop.

We's a-getting a puppy!

Now, those who've known me personally might now I've never owned a dog in my life. Up until I got married, I'd never owned a cat (now we have two). My wife, however, has gotten it into her head that she wants a Bassett Hound, has always wanted a Bassett Hound, and will not let me forget she wants a Bassett Hound till we're old and gray.

Worse, the meme has infected our kids. The add-a-dog-to-the-family meme spread through our little ka-tet faster than a liberal blogger posting new fake WMD documentation evidence. Dad, however, was the only holdout. Yes...mean, unfair, cold-as-ice, might-as-well-throw-gerbils-in-a-blender Dad.

Ok, we'll go look.

So we did - and there they were. Momma Bassett and her 5 or 6 wriggling balls of fur. Cute, ok, they were cute. The littlest one is brown & white, and she was the runt of the litter.

Mom and GiggleGirl were charmed. Even Dad gives it a begrudging nod (I know, call me a curmudgeon). BrainyBoy v7.5 was less than enthused...

Now, I haven't said much about BrainyBoy. He's 7-1/2, going on 8 and knows everything about everything. He also knows this - he likes dogs, just...from a distance. A safe distance. Say, 1.26 light years distance.

While the girls are all ooh-ing and ahh-ing together on little Rain (that's the name the owners gave it), BrainyBoy is sulking back at the van. Dad investigates:

Dad: "Hey C. c'mon over here and hold the puppy!"

C: "Um, no, that's ok. I'll just stay here in the van."

Dad: "Huh? Why?"

C: "Well, because it's hot outside...."

Dad: (Yeah, right) "C'mon, just hold him. Er, her. Er...it...whatever it is."

C: "NO!"

Dad: "I thought you wanted one of these?"

C: "I do, I want one really bad. I just don't want to hold one..."

<Fast forward past much hysterics, pouting, whining, and cajoling. Eventually he accedes when given an ultimatem...>

Dad: "C., either you walk yourself over to that pack of puppies - the mom is safely restrained elsewhere - and pick up that little pup and hold it, or we're not taking one home tonight."

Well, I was proud of him. With his back against the wall and his manboyhood in question, he did exactly that. He marched over, picked her up like a 3 pound ham and promptly set her back down again. He looked over at us, "Well?"

Laughing, we gave in. Pup's ours!

Now that the barrier has been broken, BrainyBoy was happy to have her ride in his lap all the way home (with a stop-off at PetSmart for food, bowl and other supplies).

Now everyone's in bed, pup's been watered, fed, walked, introduced to Fang and Crusher the Cat Enforcers, amid various hissing and arching of backs - oh, they'll get along fine. Eventually. Someday. When cockroaches finally rule the earth. But that's another story.

So, we're the proud owners of a 6-week-old Basset/Beagle mix with chocolate brown eyes and a sweet disposition. And she doesn't even smell too bad, either (one of my big dog-hangups). I'll post pix once we get them developed.

I've got great video of her romping with the kids in the front yard, too.

Our next task: a name. None of us really like Rain, so we need another name. Our preference is something from a Disney flick or a cartoon that the kids like. My first choice is Jesse, from Toy Story II - other names floated have been Lilo, Stitch, or Francince from the Arthur cartoons.

Oh, and anyone with special knowledge of raising Bassett Hound puppies - please inquire within.

God help us all ;)

Suffer the Children

I agree that the world is better off without Uday and Qusay Hussein, and that they were enemy combatants and not political opponents. They were not "assassinated"; they were given ample notice and opportunity to give themselves up, but they opened fire on our troops first and we had no choice but to commence the seige on the house.

I also, however, agree with some people's notion that feeling elation in the deaths of other people is a situation to be avoided. If the opportunity exists for capture with minimal casualties, then that should be the first choice.

What still bothers me is the the lack of information I've been able to find regarding Qusay's son, ______. Was he a full participant in his dad's and grandad's reign of terror? Doubtful, or we would have heard of him before. Was he fully innocent, not participating in the family business? Also doubtful, since he is related, male, and of a certain age. Did he deserve to die in a hail of bullets, TOW missles, tank rounds and goodness-knows-what-else we tossed in there? Well, he was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and had daddy Qusay been a real daddy he would've gotten him out of harm's way long ago - or in a pinch, sent him out to surrender in the 10-minute time span the American soldiers gave them to surrender.

Ok, playing on this little fantasy, what if Jr. had surrendered or been captured. Would he have been help as a POW or enemy combatant? What would you do with a 14-year-old? Again, much would have depended on his mindset- one has to look only to Dylan Klebold, late of Columbine High School, to know what a 14-year-old is capable of - so it would not be prudent to simply release the young fella. But would we have any right to keep him, maybe to rehabilitate him? Or maybe, you know, as bait to capture Grandpa? Naah, too much Dean Koontz, not enough Tom Clancy.

But none of that happened, because he died in a gun battle protecting his father and uncle. He died when he should've surrendered, should've been sent away for protection, should've been with his mother and other sisters - wherever they are.

He should've never been anywhere near that house, never should've been asked to fight. "Dad - I want to help!" "No, son - it's too dangerous. Go into the cellar and wait for me." "But Dad, I'm old enough! I hate the Americans - I can help you!!" "Quiet, now - go! Now!"

Well, Qusay, old pal.. You were part and parcel to the slaughter of thousands of Shiites. You're fingerprints, along with your father and brother, are on the handle of every gun used to put a bullet into the head of a rebel Iraqi. You turned on the plastic shredders, you filled the acid baths, you tortured the dissidents, killed the children and raped the women.

Guess what - you took the time for one last murder. Congratulations, Qusay, you sick twisted bastard, by not doing what a father should have done, you succeeded in murdering your own son. I hope his death was the last thing you ever saw, and your last thoughts were...

"What have I done?"

Drops in the Bucket

Blogging by the Numbers

"The blog [define] revolution is well underway, giving every Internet user the opportunity to become an online journalist. While it is difficult to calculate exactly how many individuals are using Web sites as journals, Blogcount estimates that there are roughly 2.4 million to 2.9 million active Weblogs as of June 2003.

Volunteer Tailgate Party - Vol. VII

SayUncle at, well, SayUncle has the latest Volunteer Tailgate Party, a bi-weekly compilation of the best and brightest blatherings of the Rocky Top Brigade.

SU adds his normal brand of pithy comments and witty sayings to each of the assembled links. Collect 'em, trade 'em with your friends!