Monday, March 31, 2003

New Broadway Play

This is just too cool. Data and Jamie Buchman in the same show! Would love to see this one...

Take Three: Reza's Spliced Life Opens on Broadway March 31

"Same four characters. Same basic situation. Three different plays. That's the basic premise of Life x 3, French dramatist Yasmina Reza's new work, which officially opens March 31 at Circle in the Square. Helen Hunt, John Turturro, Brent Spiner and Linda Emond are the two warring couples (warring with the other marrieds; warring within their own marriages) acting out a trio of versions of the same awful evening."

This Just In...

British Backtrack Over General

In related news, a Moroccan troop transport backed over a colonel today, leaving him with multiple injuries and contusions. It was believed monkeys were at the wheel of the transport which was last seen heading to the sea to pick up some errant dolphins. A visiting foreign ambassador was quoted as saying, "When will monkeys ever learn to use rear-view mirrors?".

France has lodged a protest with the UN.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Sunday, March 30, 2003

"Homicide" Bombers? Come on...

Here's a few definitions:
  1. Bomber - someone who sets off a bomb. Presumably, in these cases, with the intent to kill (or, commit homicide)

  2. Suicide Bomber - someone who sets off a bomb with the intent to commit homicide, but intentionally kills themselves in the process.

  3. Homicide Bomber - Courtesy of Department of Redundacy Department.
There is no distinction between a homicide bomber and a suicide bomber - both intend on committing homicide, and unfortunately both sometimes succeed. Fortunately for us, the suicide bomber removes him or herself from active bombing capability.

Creating a new phrase such as "homicide bombing" is disingenious, and serves no real purpose other than to attempt to educate the bottom 10% who just don't get what suicide bombers do.

However, in the spirit of fair play I'd like to offer the following new euphamisms for anyone who would like to use them:
  • Armed Robber with a Weapon
  • Assault and Battery and Hitting and Punching and Kicking
  • Disruptively Disorderly Conduct
Just trying to be a public service.

Friday, March 28, 2003

Thank goodness for the Danish

Denmark Is Officially At War With Iraq

"Late last Friday evening, parliament adopted a proposal to deploy the Navy submarine ‘S.S. Seal’ and destroyer ‘Olfert Fischer’ for the US-led war on Iraq"
Well, I'm glad about this. If they'd refused, no doubt we'd be seeing bakeries serving Cheese Freedoms.

Which, as Dave Barry might say, would be a great name for a band.

Shock and Awe

Has their ever, in the history of the English language, been a catch phrase to rise so high and far so fall in popularity in such as short time?

From last Wednesday through Saturday, it was the only thing anyone talked about.

Since then, not a word - it's used up, a has-been phrase..

Now, isn't that special???

"No Chips" Progress Report

Day 23, and no potato chips eaten. So far the coalition of the ruffling is winning. Only 17 days to go....

And, thankfully, I haven't had to resort to this.

UPDATE: Deb is feeling my pain. Check out Sugarfused and commiserate with her.

UPDATE II: Today, lunch at Cozymel's Mexican Restaurant. Every Mexican restaurant in the world serves a bowl of nacho chips and salsa with a meal. Let's just say today took an extra pound and an half of intestinal fortitude to let those babies sit untouched. (Well, at least by me. My wife and son had no such compunction and gobbled them down like crazed piranha. Thanks for the support, guys)

The Small Quiet Voice

Ok, kids, get ready for a kindler and gentler fisking. This time it's for Don Williams, Knoxville News Sentinel columnist, who today gives some advice to anti-war folks on how to "move on" from the war.

"Light up the corner where you live. Quietly point out where you think the war advocates hold mistaken beliefs. Inform them that Saddam didn't destroy the World Trade Center, as half of them believe. Ask fair questions when conversation allows: Weren't we led to believe the Iraqi army would have collapsed by now? Shouldn't the people of Southern Iraq be showering us with flowers? Why are we having to send more troops? Where are the weapons of mass destruction?"
Half of the pro-war advocates do not believe Saddam destroyed the World Trade Center. They just have not given up the possibility that it may come out he was directly involved. For some reason, Don believes there is proof of his innocence available for everyone - there is not, just not proof of his guilt. And since opinions aren't courts of law, we don't require proof to still consider that he may yet be found complicit.

Were we led to believe the Iraqi army would have collapsed by now? I don't think we were led to believe anything, as in we were deliberately misled. I believe the Pentagon didn't plan on just how evil Saddam's special forces were, and, constrained by our rules of engagement we haven't been able to completely clear the Southern part of Iraq without needless civilian deaths. It has nothing to do with underestimating actual military strength.

"Showering us with flowers" I don't believe was ever a Pentagon euphamism. However, in the tows we've liberated where those Special Forces haven't reached we have been welcomed. In some of the other towns the citizens are threatened by retaliation against their families if they welcome us, so that's why there hasn't been more jubiliation. You want celebration and flowers? Wait till everyone's aware the regime is finally out of power and the goons are taken care of, and then you'll see celebration.

More troops? Already planned - I think they told us this several times.

Where are the weapons of mass destruction? This is a bit tougher, and really is just a mantra the anti-war advocates have picked up on that has no real answer. The country hasn't been secured so there's not much chance to go actively searching the hiding places they surely exist. Plus, they may be used in defense of Baghdad. And there may have been caches discovered by the troops that haven't been reported yet. Again, you can't prove they don't exist until you can't prove that they do.

"How much is this costing? How long will we be there? What about other potential enemies, such as North Korea and Iran and radicals in Pakistan and Saudi Arabia? Won't the war only add to the chaos and violence? Who stands to gain financially from this war? Is every war America ever fought justified? Is this one? These are fair but provocative questions, to be asked in a quiet, soft voice."
I'm glad he keeps advocating the quiet, soft voice - it is a welcome break from the loud braying voice of the protests (and much more effective). As for cost and length of stay, neither are questions that have anything to do with the what they're protesting about - those are tactical and financial decisions.

The other countries? We'll watch them and see what happens. Iran and N. Korea may both implode before this is all over. And yes, it's possible the war will increase chaos but it's just as possible it will help dampen it when the Arab world sees the possibilities of a liberated Iraq. What the Coalition does there is just if not more important than what it does in the war itself.

Who stands to gain financially? A very good question, and one I'm glad that most everyone will be keeping an eye on. I still don't really trust the administration to keep their own interests clear of the reconstruction. Just be vigilant.

Is this and every war America's fought been justified? A question for philosophers and historians. I think so far WWII is the closest one we can reflect on with some objectivity, Korea and later will have to wait for time to answer questions.

"Be prepared for special forces to discover Iraqi weapons of mass destruction. They may discover links to al-Qaida. Some evidence could be fabricated or misconstrued. All governments lie, especially under pressure. Remember Watergate? Iran-Contra? Remember Monica-gate? Remember those forged documents from Niger? The Gulf of Tonkin? Remember the Maine?"
I'm sorry, I have to chuckle about this one. Monica-gate is so far apart in severity from those other instances it's hardly worth mentioning. But yes, if the government does hide the truth for us, it had better be in our best interests, not their political interests.

"Look to the long term, and be proud that you are part of something bigger than a war. For the first time in history, most of the world opposed a war that hadn't even started. Millions marched in the streets worldwide, and country after country, including most of the world's democracies, opposed the war. Yes, war came anyway, and the peace movement lost a battle, but it's winning a greater struggle. A new global consciousness has arisen in the world. More and more people are seeing the human race as mutually interdependent and are working towards the day when forces other than violence will determine history."
I'm sorry, who are you talking to? And I find it hard to believe most of the people in the world even know there's a war going on (or at least the truth about who's fighting who), and that's part of the problem. Most of the world's democracies? You have figures on that? Almost down the line, nations who opposed the war did so for political or financial reasons - i.e. because of what they themselves stand to lose. Money, power in the EU and other places, oil contracts - all selfish and have nothing to do with any real anti-war rhetoric. Don't look to them for moral examples.

And I applaud the fact people look to the day when non-violent means will solve problems, but we have to take care of dictators, oppressors and their collaboraters first.

Wednesday, March 26, 2003

Smoking Gun #6501?

This mural was found painted on a wall at Iraqi military headquarters in Nasiriya.

Marines discover Iraqi 9/11 mural

There's plenty of speculation about the meaning of this over at The Command Post, but here's my take:

Can't they do a chemical analysis of the paint and materials in the mural, and determine its age? It's bad enough if it's <18 months old, but if it's >18 months old....well, someone's got some 'splainin to do.......

Holy Grail, Batman

Is this, like, the greatest name for a British ship or what?

Aid ships set to enter Umm Qasr

A mine-clearing operation of the waterway off Umm Qasr by is still going on to make sure Britain's HMS Sir Galahad and others can safely enter the port.

Just a Taste

Quick post. I was at lunch today (Tuesday) and saw 6 choppers buzzing around overhead near the Tennessee River. Assumedly they were from the air base at McGhee Tyson Airport. 5 were flying in a "V" formation - I don't know what kind they were, but they looked mean - and the 6th looked to be a personnel transport and was trailing behind like a mother hen.

It was chilling.

But not .0001% as chilling as the Republican Guards will soon feel. Keep it flyin', guys.

Tuesday, March 25, 2003

This Just In...

Coalition of the Mandrilling

"According to the wire service, Morocco's weekly al Usbu' al-Siyassi claimed that Morocco has offered 2,000 monkeys to help detonate land mines.

An official at the Moroccan Embassy could not confirm the presence of monkeys in the coalition of the willing."
In related news, Switzerland has donated 1,000 pounds of cheese on the condition France supplies the surrendering.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Monday, March 24, 2003

One More

  1. I don't know if any of the other local bloggers noticed, but have gas prices gone down almost a dime in the last few days? Typical price for a gallon of regular unleaded was $1.59, now I've seen it in some places at $1.49, and even as low as $1.45. Hm....

A Couple of Questions and Comments

  1. When, exactly, did we suddenly start pronouncing Qatar as "cutter"? For some reason, I always thought I'd heard it pronounced "Katar" as if it rhymed with "guitar". Did I dream this?

  2. Quick way to find out if Saddam's really alive. Send him one of those spam email messages that promises to "add 5 inches". Embed in the email a link to a picture on a website, then sit back and wait. Either the site stats will record he opened the email, or he'll quickly respond. Either way, you've got him.

    Tip to Delta Force in Baghdad: Knock on the front door of his bunker and holler, "Candygram!". If he answers the door, eat him.

  3. Am I alone in this? I'm really tired of news reports that quote Pentagon officials saying something "may" have happened. "Senior Pentagon Officials today confirmed that indeed Saddam may indeed have been killed or injured in the initial strike." "Command Central officials indicated that resistance may be heavy as they approach Baghad".

    If you're going to report something, report a fact - either yes, he's toast, or no, he's not toast. Quit teasing.



Yahoo! News Alert - MANAMA, Bahrain (AP) Huge explosion heard in vicinity of U.S. Navy 5th Fleet base in Bahrain, officials say.

AP Report - Blast Outside U.S. Navy Base in Bahrain
"- A device exploded outside the U.S. Navy (news - web sites) 5th Fleet base in Bahrain Monday night, causing alarm but no injuries or serious damage, Bahraini officials said. An Information Ministry official said the explosion was caused by a cooking-gas cylinder, but security officials at the scene said it may have been a bomb. They were all speaking on condition of anonymity.
(2:30pm EST) - Banner removed, no story link.

Yahoo! News - Main page, no link, no story. - No banner, no link, no alert.

Move along, nothing to see here....

Why We're There

Take a look at this British Colonel's speech to his troops just before the conflict began. Stirring words, and heartening.

Read it twice, and share.

Thanks to The Command Post for the link

Friday, March 21, 2003

Peace Movement's Worst Nightmare

Glenn of Instapundit says that Iraqi civilians welcoming and thanking coalition forces would be the peace movement's worst nightmare.

Well, hold on there a minute. While I don't agree with their methods, or their specific reasoning, it seems to me that being proven right would be the peace movement's worst nightmare.

If there were massive civilian casualties, or if there was another major terrorist attack because of the invasion, or if there were a lot of American military losses, or a massive revolt and uprising in the Arab world....they would be proven that they were right after all.

But so far none of those things have happened. If everyone involved in the peace movement isn't at least relieved and cautiously optimistic up to this point, there's really something wrong wtih their view of justice and the America way.. And that would be a nightmare.

UPDATE: Seems some other folks disagree with this statement as well, but Glenn doesn't link to them (rats!). However, he does link to our own Instalawyer who has some things to say.

I will concede that there is likely a strong anti-semitic/anti-Israel behind some -- some -- of the peace movement, and ANSWER also played a major role. However, there are always those with ulterior motives ready to prey on the those needing a push in the right (or wrong) direction. It's those people, the majority of folks who opposed the war on the same unfounded suppositions and non-occuring events that I write about above that I'm speaking about. For them, they should be glad the war is going the way it is because their greatest nightmares HAVE NOT come true, and Iraq is truly being liberated. Anything besides that suggests ulterior motive, as I said, or a degree of close-minded hatred and refusal to accept facts that is truly troubling.

Body Count

Double-digit civilian body count in Baghdad at the very most, I'd say. Of course, no official or even speculative word at all yet but from all the info regarding the empty palace targets and precision of ordinance I would say this is very likely.

I hope I'm right.

Resistance is futi--...oh, screw it - we're going home.

U.S.S. Clueless has a great analogy comparing the Iraqi army to an ant colony that's lost its queen. Sounds more like the Borg to me...

We are the Borg.
Lower your guns and let us surrender our armies.
Your biological and technological distinctiveness is too much for us.
From this moment on we exist to one.
Resistance was futile. And hazardous to our health.

Hail to the King, Baby....

Saddam Offers Rewards For Coalition Lives

"Saddam Hussein has decreed that any Iraqi who kills an enemy soldier will get a reward equivalent to $14,000. And $28,000 will go to anyone who captures an enemy soldier alive, the decree said, according to the official Iraqi News Agency. Shooting down an enemy fighter plane is worth $55,500, a helicopter, $28,000, and a missile, $5,500. Killing the pilot will bring $14,000; capturing the pilot alive is worth twice as much.
C'mon, guys, open up the pocketbooks. I think I got more points for that playing Duke Nukem III.

And where and when exactly is Joe Iraqi soldier going to collect this booty? The 1st United Hussein Bank of Hell? I hear the drive-thru windows take an eternity to get through, and the suckers all taste like black licorice...

Legion of Doom

Iraq: U.S. a 'super power of villains'

"This is a complete disgrace. They are a super power of villains."
-- Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saaed Sahaf
Lex Luthor and Gorilla Grodd were unavailable for comment, although Poison Ivy and the Scarecrow were seen heading to Baghdad for last defense efforts.

Wanted: Publicist. Inquire Within. Competive Wages Offered

Ok, congrats to the usual suspects:

Iraq war is hot topic on Knoxville blog sites

Meanwhile, I'm thinking of hiring a PR firm. SayUncle, Elephant Rants, Justin, Rex...ever feel like the Junior Super Friends?

Maybe we're just not long-winded controversial enough. I'll have to work on that.....

UPDATE: VINDICATION!! (KNS March 22, Page A-10)

Ok, I'll stop now.

Thursday, March 20, 2003

Baghdad City Miracle

Just a crude analogy, but if we did get Saddam and/or any of his sons in that initial barrage, it will be like running the opening kickoff back for a touchdown. What would Mike Keith and Pat Ryan say?

By the way...

Old Navy's newest pitchman, or now starring in live-action version of Mr. Magoo? You decide.

Wide Eyes

My 7-year-old son came into the living room this morning, and saw Brian Williams and his gas mask on the Today Show. He stopped in his tracks at the top of the stairs, eyes wide. A thousand thoughts went through my brain..."Well, C., he's showing what it's like to put on a gas mask"...."It's just a joke"...."He's..he's..."

But words escaped me. He just asked us to turn it to Nickelodean.

He was 5-1/2 and one month into kindergarten on 9/11 (my brother's birthday, incidentally). Yesterday was my wife's birthday. C. just turned 7 last month.

Where am I going with this? Nowhere. Just that I want this to be over.

Wednesday, March 19, 2003

And So It Begins

Would you rather...

  • Learn of authorities foiling a terrorist attack here in America or against American interests, or

  • Not hear of anything (whether nothing happens or something got foiled) and keep wondering...
Either way supposes that there was not a successful attack. While the former shows the success of our security measures, it proves the terrorists are still actively trying to hit us. With the latter you might have no idea if security is working or not but at least you are not aware of anything.

I'm not sure if "ignorance is bliss" trumps "well-informed but worried" here.

Me, I'd like to go to sleep and wake up something next week.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003


I just don't feel like talking or posting. My stomach's full of rocks.

I'll post rehearsal reports, and my feeling about the movie Chicago...sometime.

Till then, here's a prayer. Thanks, Wylie.

Monday, March 17, 2003

Set Theory

Remember, those who are opposed to military action in Iraq are not Democrats, they're not liberals, they're pacifists - those to which violence is never a solution. Just because someone is a Democrat, or a liberal, does not mean they are anti-war or pacifistic. It does happen that a number of pacifists are liberals, but not all liberals are pacifists.

Now, that does not include Democratic politicians. They lean however they feel their constituents are leaning, and don't count.

Rehearsals Start Tonight

Rehearsals for Company begin tonight. I'm not looking forward to associating this show with a war, but that's the way it's going to be years from now. I'll let everyone know how the first read-thru went, if the internet lines aren't clogged like 9/11.

Saturday, March 15, 2003

The Bachelor

Just me tonight. Wife's out of town on a church retreat, kids are at their grandparents. Going to go see Chicago finally, and see if Peter Cetera makes a guest appearance...

Friday, March 14, 2003

World's Worst II

Ok, riff on the World's Worst....SuperVillain


Have at it.

Thursday, March 13, 2003

Democrats actually do run businesses, and are nice people, too...

Bill Hobbs continues to be impressed Governor Bredesen, which is great, and compliments his stand on waiting a year for lottery money to be used for scholarships. But...

Is he really a Democrat, or does he just play one on TV?
I hope you don't really mean this. Are you expressing amazement that a Democrat might be able to make a common sense, informed decision that doesn't pander to his business or special interests? I think other parties (not naming any names) can be equally blamed in that category. And besides, the issue discussed has nothing to do with wantonly raising taxes (a typical Democratic stereotype) and simply points out a sound business decision - to wait and get a better idea of what revenues a lottery might generate before applying it to scholarships. The year's worth of money generated can help prop up the government, then when they get a handle on the amount it can be applied to schools next year. Amazing a Democrat would have had a good business thought!

You have a great blog, Bill and I respect your writing a great deal, but I hope you don't let these kinds of biases slip through very much - that's why we have Rush.

P.S. When are you going to add a comments section, Bill?

UPDATE: My mistake - Rich from Shots Across the Bow guest-authored the article on Bill's site.

Man of Electrodes

You will believe a man can breathe.

I have no doubts that Christopher Reeve will someday walk again. I just feel it. Good for him, one of my childhood heroes.

Midwives at the Carousel Theatre

Paige M. Travis reports on the new play at UT's Ula Love Doughty Carousel Theatre, Midwives in this week's Metropulse.

I worked in the Carousel Theatre several times as an undergad at UT and it's a very interesting place to do a show. What I remember most is the ability to remove the walls and let the outside air come in, when desired. Theatre in the round, or when the stage is partially or totally surrounded by the audience, is a very intimate form of theatre that keeps the actors always in view. On a traditional stage, there's always the opportunity to disappear into the wings or behind a set piece, but in the round you're always there and always somewhere in the scene if you're on the stage. As such, an actor has to always be "on", and even when they have no dialogue or movement, they have to remain true to their character and not disappear into themselves. Very challenging, but very rewarding.

UPDATE: There's a letter to the editor in the 'Pulse today, too, about theatre and coverage of the Arts in general in Knoxville.

Wednesday, March 12, 2003

Commentus Interruptus

Looks like my Comments section is acting up. Please send me an email at if you want to comment on something I've posted. Meanwhile, my crack team of Gully Dwarves (who will speak to me if I feed them) are looking into the problem....

UPDATE: Comments fixed! Glub like comments! Want rat, make stew. Stew like stew. Stew like life! Mmmm...rat...

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

Confessions of a Salty Mind

Ok, I have a confession to make. I've been needing to get this off my chest for awhile now, and I think it's time.

I am going crazy.

But not why you might think.

You see, I have an addiction. A terrible addiction - yes, it's out there now. I can talk about it. The freedom, the liberation, the blessings that only exposing the problem to the world can bring. For you see....

I am addicted to potato chips.

Oh, the horror! The indignity! I scarce can face myself, much less my loyal readers, and even my Gully Dwarves shun me. The shame has grown too much to bear.

For you see, it's not just one kind of chips - I mean all chips. Barbequed, Wisconsin Cheese, Ruffled, Wavy Lays, Pringles, Bacon&Cheddar, Golden Flake, name brand or store brand, it doesn't matter... Late at night, in the dim light of the television set I grab a bag and munch until my mouth has a little yellowish/orange ring and there are crumbs all over the floor. But it doesn't stop there - oh, no, foolish mortal. Then there's the blessed world of Cheetos. Crispy, Baked, (and when they haven't pulled it from the shelves - curse their souls!!! - the X's and O's....*drool*). Of course, marching tauntingly behind are the Nacho chips: Scoops, Bite Size, Rounds....the mind staggers. Sometimes I'm even been known to smuggle into the house some Funyons, or maybe, on a wild day....a Sun Chip.

However, now comes the rub. They are all gone. I have *sob* --- say it!!! say it!!! --- given up chips for Lent.

*Sigh*.. Ok. Now you know. Since Wednesday night last week, I haven't had a single chip. I've been tempted---oh, my, I've been tempted. The conveniently huge bag of Doritos my wife bought last week, before she knew what I was going to do. Unopened, it sits on the shelf, mocking me.

Mocking me.

I pass a little tray at Kroger's that has Cheese Puffs out for your tantalizingly tasting pleasure. No! Get thee behind me, Satan! Tempt me not with your delectable cheesiness!

The little bags in the snack machine at work. Oh, they taunt me....Trust us! No one will know! There's only two chips in these bags anyway - who will know???. But so far, I have resisted.

Can I hold out until Easter? 6 days down, 34 to go. I don't know -- I just don't know.

There is one small consolation - I have allowed myself popcorn and crackers. A guy can only take so much torture, you know.

However, if you happen to go into a Weigel's or Pilot Food Mart sometime in the next few weeks and say a poor, lonely guy gibbering in the corner while clutching a package of kindly and pass on by. Nothing to see here....

Words Fail Me.

French Fries Get New Name in Congress

There is just no gas left in the tank. No words to describe how utterly stupid, meaningless and worse - childish this is. The United States Congress is officially sticking out its tongue and waggling its fingers in its ears at another Western country.



World's Worst...

Say Uncle has been doing an ongoing series on "185" jokes, so in my attempt to capitalize on his idea and blatantly attract more people to visit my site, I'll do one.

This is World's Worst (one of my favorites on Who's Line) : The players step forward and give an example of the world's worst whatever the audience suggested

Round One: Give examples of the World's Worst Blogger.

Curtain up

I feel like Michele - I didn't set out to talk about internation stuff, or politics, just the things about my own life I find interesting and want to share with others. So for the duration of "Company", I'm going to talk some theatre.

And, to start off: What's the best play you ever saw? Leave a comment below.

I'll go first: My favorite play of all time is "Into the Woods" by Steven Sondheim and James Lapine. In 1990 I worked for a summer as an Assistant Stage Manager at the Seaside Music Theatre in Daytona Beach, FL. They're a professional repertory company that specializes in summer and Christmas musical seasons. Their production of "Into the Woods" was the first non-touring, regional theatre production in the US.

If you're unfamiliar with the show, basically it's an amalgamation of several different fairy tales, all happening at the same time. Cinderella runs through the woods with Jack (and his Beanstalk), Little Red Riding Hood, the Wolf, the obligatory witch, Rapunzel and many others. It's a fantastic show.

But what struck me then, and stays with me now is one of the central themes of the story:

Take care of your children, be careful what you teach them because children will listen. Be careful of the way you live your lives, because children are looking up to you for "which way to turn, to learn what to be"... We have a responsibilty to our children, not just to teach them right from wrong but to show them the difference and how it affects our own lives. It was a powerful message for me - marriage was 2 years away, my son another 7, but I think the message of that show helped prepare me for fatherhood.

I was lucky enough to be Musical Director for "Into the Woods" in 1998 in Oak Ridge, and that has become my favorite experience in amateur theatre so far. I can't wait to do it again.


Monday, March 10, 2003

Negative Implications

Net Said to Close Around Osama bin Laden

This supposed "net" or "noose" has supposedly been tightening around Bin Laden for a week now. If it gets any tighter, it's going to disappear and reappear in a parallel universe somewhere. Just get the guy, already, if he's really there.

Sunday, March 09, 2003

Audition Success

I got a part! The play "Company" is a Steven Sondheim musical from the 70's about a 35-year-old bachelor, his girlfriends, and 4 married couple friends that are trying to convince him to get married. I'm playing Peter, one of the married men.

Rehearsals start next week, and I'll try to do a blog journal of the process, in case any who's interested in theatre might want to know how it works. The performances are late April-early May and everyone in the Knoxville area is invited (it's at the Oak Ridge Playhouse).

Saturday, March 08, 2003

Ark II

Well, it's March 8 and since last October, we've all been waiting to open up the package and find out what doom has been fortold for this date...

March 8, 2003.

So, are we doomed as doomed can be, you know?

Now we have to wait till April 15, 2003.

Tax day. I should have known....

Well, until then I guess I'm selling all my duct tape and buying scuba gear and wading boots....

UPDATE: Super secret sensitive link: Don't tell anyone you got it from me....

Quick Audition Post

Auditioned for "Company" at the Oak Ridge Playhouse today - went pretty well. Got a call-back for tomorrow afternoon, will let everyone know what happens tomorrow or Monday.

Thursday, March 06, 2003

Two years and counting since the last stomach virus...

Jay at The Daily Rant posts about getting sick a lot more after you have kids.

Very good points, but here's a bonus:

Regardless of how people feel about nursery school/daycare/preschool versus keeping the kids at home until Kindergarten, I've noticed a marked reduction in illnesses in my kids once they hit 4 yrs old or so, because, being in daycare and preschool since they were 6 months old, they've caught everything they're going to catch and have built up some immunities.

When they were 6mo - 3 years old, they got everything a normal school-aged kid would get: RSV, Rotovirus, ear infections, eye infections (well, they both didn't get all of those, that's just the sum total).

But now that my girl is 3-1/2 and my son is 7 and in 1st Grade, they (and subsequently, we) haven't been sick nearly as much. I averaged 2-3 stomach viruses a year when they were little, which, if you know me know that I consider them to be more torturous than 1,000 flu's, colds, bacterial infections, etc. But that's another story.

Anyway, C.'s only missed a couple days of school since he started Kindergarten, even though I hear daily of other kids in his class that are always sick from various ailments. I would bet the majority of them didn't go to daycare.

So, as I say, rant and rave anyone who wants to about the benefits of staying home with your kids until they start school, but there is one HUGE advantage...

Osama Bin Gotten?

Little Green Footballs is reporting the rumors that Bush's press conference tonight may be announcing the capture of Osama Bin Laden.

Talk about Must-See-TV!

Side note: I used to read LGF a lot, till it got too depressing and too hawkish. Now I only go every once in a while. I read this article, then after perusing the rest of the articles on the page I remember now why I stopped....

UPDATE: Well, ok not yet. But maybe tomorrow?


Y'know, it is perfectly acceptable to leave comments. I'm beginning to feel a bit used ;)


Parents, teachers worried fine arts, gym classes may be cut

In no way can this be allowed to happen. Fine arts are just as important to the school curriculum as other, more academic subjects.

But then, I'm sure conservatives would worry fine arts are turning out too many liberals - you know, the ones that think, and feel, and understand the world, and actually can express themselves without using numbers and dollar signs? Right, those guys...

I'm Insignificant!!!

TTLB Blogosphere Ecosystem

Things I Ponder

When I'm feeding our cats, I'll talk to them. No big deal - I don't think I'm Dr. Doolittle or anything, I'll just say the usual things like, "Here you go, guys", or "Whoa, take it easy, not all at once", or "Ouch! Hey, you little Furby, stop biting my toes!".

Anyways, whilst I'm making this conversation, by white cat "Tas" (Another Dragonlance reference. You'd think I was obsessssssssed) looked up at me in my eyes.

Now, I know it's typical human behaviour to look into the other person's eyes when you speak to them, but why would a cat? Do they learn this from watching other humans? Maybe he's actually looking at my mouth (where the sound's coming from, for those of you who came in late) and since it's close to my eyes it's just an illusion. Of course, he could just as easily be looking at my elbow, or my kneecap, or my toes ("mmmmm....toes..."). So why would he see the need to look at me in the eyes like a human would do with another human? Does he know something I don't? Do I want to know? Does he own me money? And what about Naomi....

These are the things I think about when I'm putting off going to bed.

Wednesday, March 05, 2003

My Own Personal Dead Zone

There's a part of my brain that is forever and totally inaccesible. It's the part that understands words and concepts such as:
  • Purchase Order
  • Balloon Mortgage
  • Prime Lending Rate
  • Health Maintenance Organization
  • Compound Interest
  • Invoice
  • Certificate of Deposit
  • Roth IRA
...and the list goes on.

I'm pretty good at math, but where math intersects with economics - zip. Nada. As Bill and Mike can attest from my posts and comments.

Well, actually this site helped me understand a little about the stock market. Maybe there's hope for me yet...

Don't bet on it.

Welcome to Readers of the 24th Carnival of the Vanities

Thanks for coming. Pay no attention, however, to the man behind the curtain that brought you here.

Next week the COV is being hosted by (full and honorary) Rocky Top Brigadiers Jay and Jane at The Daily Rant. Be sure and visit their site, too -- you don't have to worry about getting stuck in the muck like that other site.

Pardon me while I go wash my hands...

Putting the Pieces Together...

I just want to know if this:

Al Qaeda Chief Was Plotting New Attacks, U.S. Officials Say

"A U.S. intelligence memo dated Feb. 26 warned Mohammed was overseeing plans to attack suspension bridges, gas stations and power plants in New York and other major cities, Newsweek reported Sunday."
...Which also yielded this:

Pakistan raid nets possible al Qaeda names

"Meanwhile, FBI agents are trying to track down possible al Qaeda operatives in the U.S., including some believed to be in Washington and other U.S. cities, after names were found among a "treasure trove" of material recovered during Mohammed's capture, sources said."
...Has anything to do with this:

FBI Says Arrests in Norris Dam Incident Show Good Security

"Norris Dam is considered a hard terrorist target, or a highly-patrolled place. While the FBI says there was never a physical threat to the dam, agents are investigating possible links the brothers could have to terrorist organizations."
...Not to mention this:

Local Law Enforcement Responds on Threats at Hospitals

"The latest reports, which involve unidentified men taking pictures of hospitals and businesses, have authorities again looking into weekly tips"
If any of these events are related to each other, I hope they confirm it quickly.

Lower Forms of Life.

Apparently, according to the Blogosphere Ecosystem I'm not even an Insignificant Microbe...

Well, this disheartened me a great deal, so after several minutes of uncontrolled weeping I emerged from my self-pity to actually submit my site for consideration. Looks like your ranking is determined by how may sites are linking to you, and the results were:


Which puts me in that Insignificant Microbe category. O Joy! O Rapture! I have Evolved!

Waitaminnit...6? C'mon, folks, link to me! Help you friendly innkeeper grow up the food chain. I mean, seriously - I've got hungry gully dwarves to feed here, and when they're not fed they get cranky.

Do you really want Instapundit and Lileks to have all the fun?

Oh crap! I linked to them!! *hits head Chris Farley-style*.

Oh, and for those who started reading thinking I was going to start talking about Republicans...sorry. Not this time.


Tuesday, March 04, 2003

This Just In...

Philadelphia police say dead man had missing organs and rope around his neck

"Police responding to a report of a dead body turned the victim over and found his heart, a lung and other organs had been cut out. 'Either ... there's a really sick person out there who wants to keep somebody's internal organs, or is there a market for this? Or are they trying to send a message?' homicide Capt. Charles Bloom said after the discovery Friday afternoon."
In related news, recent startup internet auction site "SickBay" just reported its online traffic tripling since this time last week. Company officials were unavailable for comment, but were reportedly looking into acquiring rare lettermen's jackets, prosthetic hooks, and New York City sewer alligators.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

News from Neverland

If ever you feel in a bit of despair, maybe don't know which way to go, are confused and think things can't get much worse...

Well, (in the immortal words of Dwayne Schneider) always remember and don't ever forget: thank goodness you're not Michael Jackson.

Magazine: Michael Jackson Put 'Curse' on Spielberg

"Vanity Fair reported in the article that in 2000 Jackson attended a voodoo ritual in Switzerland where a witch doctor promised that Spielberg, music mogul David Geffen and 23 other people on the entertainer's list of enemies would die.

Jackson, who underwent a "blood bath" as part of the ritual, then ordered his former business adviser Myung-Ho Lee to wire $150,000 to a bank in Mali for a voodoo chief named Baba, who sacrificed 42 cows for the ceremony, the magazine reported."
So if you're ever in despair, just be glad you're nowhere near this out of touch with reality.

Sunday, March 02, 2003

KATC Awards Report

Well, I'm back from the awards.


Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, which I directed, was up for a Best Children's Theatre Show Award.....but it didn't win. Oh well -- better luck next time..

But, All Night Strut, the 5-person musical I performed in won Best Short Production or Special Works!. So it was a mixed blessing evening.

The Knoxville theatre community is very interesting. Comprising companies from Knoxville (including the University of Tennessee), Oak Ridge, Sevierville, and Cumberland County, there's quite an eclectic group of people represented from all walks of life. From couples married for years to transient MFA students from UT, to career amateur actors to part-time duffers like me, there's a wide diversity in the personalities in this area.

But I love it. I'm auditioning for Company next week. Here we go again..............;)

Saturday, March 01, 2003

Hmm...something's getting lost in the translation...

The Talking Dog, a blog that has a great bloglist, has added Inn of the Last Home to his "Dog Run". Thanks, pooch!

However - here's part of his description:

"The commentary bounces around from matters Tennessee (and Knoxville) to matters national and matters war and peace, and though the perspective is indistinguishably right wing, though in a down-home style that makes it all a little less unpalatable."
Right wing??? Ok, something's obviously not working correctly here. Lemme take a quick glance back at some of my postings...

Supporting religious freedom in the schools, and freedom from harrasment - Check.

Against the discrimination against French and Germans - Check.

Cautiously pro-Tennessee-Income-Tax - Check.

Works in theatre and the arts - Check.

0% Republican - Check.

Stricter interpretation of the 2nd Amendment - Check (comments on other blogs).

Tap tap tap this thing on? Hm...Universal Translator must be broken - gotta get Hoshi to fix this thing....

Anyway...thanks, Talking Dog!

Half-Bakered Fisks The Commercial Appeal on Bredesen

Mike Hollihan of Half-Bakered delivers a well-earned rebuttal of the Memphis Commercial Appeal's editorial on Tennessee Governor Phil Bredesen. Good (if lengthy) reading, but a few points:

"Currently seven percent, maybe nine [percentage cuts being made in the state budget]. I'm still amazed to see this, and the apparent seriousness of his actions. I'm still in the "cautiously non-pessimistic" category, though. I'm a deeply suspicious person by nature (You're surprised, right?) and I still think it's entirely possible that this isn't good faith on Bredesen's part. Naifeh and the unions that depend on State money have been far too compliant and quiet here.

I think it may also be possible that this is the setup. Bredesen will make cuts and then sit back. As the complaints roll in, as the evidence piles up of people being "hurt," as "services" are cut, he'll slowly begin to make the case that he tried, but real solutions will only happen if we put the income tax back on the table. In other words, this is the "cover your ass" period, to be followed by the "look over there!" period, then to be concluded with the sad, head-shaking "we have no choice" endgame.

I could be wrong; I worry that I'm not."
MIke, I understand you're deeply suspicious by nature, but so far these seem to be the right things to do. Don't you think you should be giving Bredesen the benefit of the doubt that he is doing the right thing? Somehow, remaining suspicious and waiting for him to grow an evil mustache is not helping matters, and is unfair. If he actually does something you disagree with, feel free to criticize, but don't count your taxes before their hatched...

"Naturally, they don't pass up the chance to repeat the tired "horn-honkers" slur, but to claim that protesters rioted inside the Capitol is a plain, pure lie! There is nothing to support that claim but the cold reptilian minds of the editors. Every television station in the State played video of that protest and the crowds inside were loud and barely respectful, but they were merely an angry, aimless, milling crowd."
Regardless of how you define the word "riot", but that does not excuse the shameful and neandrathal behaviour of all the people involved in that "horn-honking, storm the capital" fiasco. Which leads me to....

"Bredesen promised, under all but the most dire of circumstances, to avoid the income tax if at all possible. Probably. He didn't say anything about 'giving it a rest'..."
I understand people were, and continue to be against an income tax. I don't know enough about economics to have a strong opinion either way, although from what I've been able to gather I wouldn't mind if it were implemented, if it would help the Tennessee economy. BUT...too many people who oppose the Income Tax seem to think there is an unholy quality to the idea. Somehow, if it were implemented the portal of the Abyss would be opened and the draconians from within would leap out to devour us and drag the citizenry back into the Abyss for torment by the Dark Queen Takhisis herself... Folks, it's a tax structure, that's all. It's a way of handling money. There are better ways of getting your points across regarding Taxation Methods than the righteous indignation I've seen from the majority of the Anti-Income-Tax laws. There were lawmakers actually running scared from appearing to support it, and some were actually voted out of office because of it. Other issues such as lobbyist bribes are forgiven or conveniently ignored - but should our State Senator support an Income Tax! Burn the Witch!!! C'mon, how about some perspective???

UPDATE: Half-Bakered responds to my response. Or something like that...

Spring is coming...

I finally got to go out today for a while and soak up some sun. Helped E. ride her bike, walked with her and C. up and down the neighborhood on his scooter. Cleaned some gutters, and just generall enjoyed the sunshine. It's March 1, ergo it's time for spring.

Is it just me, or do other Knoxvillians agree that this has been the lousiest January/February in a long time? Combining snows, floods, cold weather and just general days and days or rain and grey skies, I've never been happier to hear some of the spring birds returning to East Tennessee.

Then, of course, the Vols lost by about 85 points - but I don't let that put a damper on things ;)

I saw my cousin today, who's pregnant with her first child. It was a kick seeing her 4 months along!

Sunday night's the KATC awards. Wish me luck!

End of line.

UPDATE: We're sorry, but reports of spring's arrival seem to have been greatly exaggerated.

A House Divided

Randy Cassingam of This is True, who is following the India Tracy case, discusses the implications of modern Christianity with a preacher friend, Dr. Rev. Rus Jeffrey.

Prominent among Dr. Jeffrey's comments are those which point out the rift dividing Christians today, and how the reasons go against Biblical teachings:

"Rus: You mean how do I personally address it? By always pointing out that it's wrong. By modeling for the people who follow me the right way to live with one another and be speaking words of "life" instead of "death." I actually had to address this with one of our leaders here not too long ago. I heard he was saying things he shouldn't be saying. So, I sat him down and reminded him of Proverbs 6:16-19. In that passage it says there are "six things the Lord hates, and the seventh He abhors....sowing dissension among the brethren." I reminded him that when we say things about others it's out of line and it causes "dissension" even when we usually say "I didn't mean to make anyone mad. I simply don't put up with it.
Amazing how so many of our problems have common roots, isn't it? Rus goes on to say:

"Sometimes I simply point out that even though we don't agree with what someone else might think, it does not give us permission to abuse them verbally. Again, that's "sowing dissension." Sometimes I simply smile and say -- "Well, I guess that person isn't living up to their full potential yet. But then again, they probably figure we aren't living up to our full potential either." :-) "
Sowing dissension. Whether in Union County schools, or when discussing foreigners who don't happen to agree with us, or our fellow citizens who have different opinions about war than you, it's all the same.

Reunite our house, before the splits grow too wide to heal...