Cruising on the Carnival Glory

CARNIVAL GLORY REVIEW

DEC 27th – JAN 3rd (New Year’s sailing)

THE CARNIVAL GLORY

My wife and I decided to take our fourth cruise with Carnival, this time on the Carnival Glory over New Year’s 2014/2015. The big difference this time being that we were able to take our teenage children along with us: 18-yr-old college freshman son and 15-yr-old high school sophomore daughter.  We actually didn’t tell the kids until Christmas Day.  “Pack your bags, we leave tomorrow!”

Kids open their "cruise" presents, including new flip-flops!

Day 0, Dec 26 (pre-cruise)

We left Knoxville, TN by car at 9am on Friday, December 26th headed to Miami, FL. Our intent was to drive the 9 hours to Orlando, visit some of the public Disney or Universal attractions like Downtown Disney or CityWalk but massive construction traffic south of Atlanta (Walking Dead country) kept our schedule tight. We did make it to our pre-arranged hotel in Orlando but only had time for a quick bite and then to bed, ready to make it the rest of the way tomorrow.

Day 1, Dec 27 (Embarkation)

We made the 3-1/2 hour drive from Orlando to Miami without incident, and parked in the Port of Miami parking garages. There was a lot of back and forth between us on whether to use off-site, cheaper port parking, but due to many negative reviews online we decided to go the safer and more convenient route of parking at the port.

Being accustomed to the process, plus carrying all our luggage and backpacks ourselves made getting on board the ship very easy. We were lucky enough to have received a very low-cost cabin upgrade to a Promenade deck balcony cabin just behind the bridge which was a big bonus.

We have a balcony?  We have a balcony!!

View From the Bridge.  Or View OF the Bridge, rather, from the balcony of our cabin on Deck 8, Forward Starboard (8211)

Our daughter gazes at the water from our balcony, as the wind and setting sun catch her hair in a frenzy.

Beautiful Miami shoreline

Sunset behind us and the trailing Celebrity Reflection

A Sail-away drink!

What have we gotten ourselves into?

After a couple hours relaxing on the deck and enjoying the sail-away from Miami, we had our first early seating dinner in the Platinum Dining Room.  I’ll go ahead at this point and make a few remarks about the main dining room experience.  I was a bit disappointed to have a table for four by ourselves – not that our family doesn’t enjoy eating together (our meals can become legendary for their comedy, music and general silliness) but that a big highlight of our previous cruises was the novelty of having great tablemates from around the country and world to share each evening’s stories with, as well as have familiar faces in the various ports and friends to keep in contact with after the cruise is over.  We would have gladly shared a large table with other couples or families, but were never given that option when choosing our dinner time and location. However, other than that the dinner meals were quite good and there was a nice variety of dishes to satisfy our generally picky family.  Ok, I’m the picky one, but we never wanted for a good meal to end the day. Our waiter and his staff were warm and pleasant (and learned each of our names from the very beginning). The main waiter was from the Philippines and was looking forward to returning there in a few weeks for a visit.  The opportunity to meet and get to know people from all over the world has always been an enjoyable part of our cruises.

Sometimes the dinners on-board ship...

...can get a little raucous!

We visited the Piano Bar briefly, and enjoyed a little sing-a-long with the pianist, but everyone was tired so we moved back to the cabin for the night.

Oh, I almost forgot the bane of every cruiser’s experience: the safety briefing. Mind-numbingly boring typically, although I’ll just say on this trip we got to view the aftereffects of those fine gentlemen who waste no time plunging into the alcohol the moment they come on board.  One in particular made the normally low-key necessary event quite tedious with his raucous and disrespectful attitude toward the well-meaning crew assistants.  My daughter in particular was very tempted to whack the guy on the back of the head after one of his (too him and his buddies only) hilariously inebriated comments, but cooler heads prevailed.  I told her our only consolation was if the ship did go down, we’d be safe in the lifeboats and he’d still plastered to a barstool somewhere, wondering what happened to the bartender and why was it getting so wet?

Day 2, Dec 28 (First Sea Day)

The day began a little rough, as my wife who was battling the trailing edge of a chest cold was affected by the motion of the ship more than usual and needed some down time to adjust.  My daughter, as well, needed some time to get her sea legs so the morning and afternoon was spent by them adjusting while my son and I explored the ship.

I’d like to give a big shout-out to “Guy’s Burger Joint” onboard the Glory – actually one of the best burgers I’ve ever had, especially without all the spicy fixings that were offered as options on the menu. The décor of the corner eatery on the Lido deck was Guy Fieri-California surfer chic, which quite fits the Food Network Star’s persona.  It was a big hit once we all got our stomachs under control, and I looked forward to having another in a few days.

Each Carnival ship has a “theme” that sets it apart from the other ships in the fleet, reflected in the décor, lounge and club names and other aspects of the interior design.  Glory’s was “color” and each of the main areas of the ship had a “colorful” name, such as the Amber Palace Theatre, the Ebony Lounge, Ivory Club, Blue Room (smoking bar), Gold and Platinum Dining Rooms, the White Heat Dance Club, and more.  Many were connected by the “Kaleidoscope Way”, a long promenade below decks that was the main commercial and social thoroughfare of the ship.  Our last cruise on the Carnival Valor had patriotic themes, and I enjoy the way Carnival decides how to differentiate its ships and make each cruise experience unique.

It was interesting cruising with an 18-yr-old – he was old enough to get into any of the 18+ areas or activities, such as the casino or the Adult Comedy shows, but too young to drink and there weren’t too many people his own age on board.  But he’s adaptable and not one who feels lost without constant social activity so he was fine.  In fact, he met up with a couple of young ladies near his age during the course of the trip and enjoyed himself in that regard.

Similarly, cruising with a 15-yr-old girl has its own challenges in making sure she is occupied and finds interesting things to do.  Carnival has a lounge for 15-17 yr-olds but after checking them out a couple of times she declined to participate.  It would be nice for Carnival to spend as much energy providing activities for teens as they do for children, but I suppose you can’t have everything!

Most of the rest of the day was spent relaxing on deck. My wife and I camped out in a hammock on the Serenity (21+) Deck, and enjoyed some hot tub time. I understand the reasoning behind an adults-only sunning area, as it’s nice to have an area with no kids running around screaming, but I think 21 is maybe too old a cut-off. Neither of our kids could enjoy it, but I guess I understand it.

We all attended the evening “Playlist Productions” show in the Amber Palace Theatre, a Motown revue performed by eight talented entertainers.  This evening’s show was enjoyable, but I’ll have more to say about this aspect of the cruise’s entertainment later on.

Gotta love the towel animals....

Day 3, Dec 29 (Second Sea Day)

December in the Caribbean is something new to us, the weather is not quite as hot but the humidity is still evident.  Nevertheless, the 2nd day at sea was hit or miss with the sun and a few squalls came through during the evening hours. Nothing too terrible.

I must say I enjoy the Trivia Contests and always seem to place fairly high in Star Wars Trivia. Yet another solid gold plastic ship-on-a-stick to add to my collection!

It was spa day for my wife and daughter – facials, massages, exfoliations, dishing about guys – whatever women do in the spas.

The evening’s entertainment was “Hasbro, The Game Show” which was decent if a little juvenile.  I was able to get up on stage and participate after answering a trivia question (thank you, Superman and the Daily Planet!) and got to play a Skee-ball type game based on the kid’s game, “Operation.” I won an electronic Simon game!

I have started to wish that Carnival would put their collective heads together and think up some new on-board activities that didn’t involve either, a) trivia, b) drinking and carousing, or c) an interest in self-improvement lectures like acupuncture and yoga. Other than these things and wandering about the ship/laying out on deck, there’s not much to do on a sea day when you’re on a ship that doesn’t have a skydive simulator, interactive video scavenger hunts or water skiing off the back of the ship (my kids’ idea).

Day 4, Dec 30 (Saint Martin)

 

Five different ships in the Saint Martin Philipsburg port that day.  That's a lot of ship.

Ah, the meat of the trip finally arrives – the ports and excursions!  On the Valor, my wife and I participated in the America’s Cup yacht race when we were in “Sint Maartin” (which is my all-time favorite shore excursion) but this trip we opted to give the kids their first ocean-based snorkeling experience.  There’s truly nothing like sailing through the Philipsburg, SM’s Great Bay in a catamaran on a beautiful Caribbean day that makes you want to move there forever…  After the cruise was over, both kids proclaimed the snorkeling in Little Bay, our first destination that day, to be their favorite part of the cruise.  Unfortunately for me, even though this day happened to also be my birthday, my luck didn’t prevent me from carving several gashes in my lower right leg on some of the rocks while I tried to clean out my diving mask.  Only when I got back to the boat and my wife noticed me about to bleed all over the deck did I notice anything amiss. However, the good folks crewing the catamaran patched me up and I was none the worse.  After snorkeling was finished, they continued on around the southern tip of the island past Cay Bay to Cole Bay for some beach time.

Great Bay of Philipsburg, Saint Martin.  Or is that Little Bay?  Hard to tell.

I'm going to buy one of these someday and live here.  Just you watch me...

....if the rocks and coral don't kill me first.

Man, those planes land....

...and fly really, really close to you.

Beach respite

Vantage point from my resting spot on the catamaran.  Not too shabby for what would have been a workday, huh?

After returning to the marina, we took a water taxi over to Philipsburg proper for a little exploration of the town-front area.  The MAC store was a hit with our 15 year old daughter!  Sadly, time was short and it was time to return to the Glory.   I love wandering Philipsburg and wish we had had more time there.  We were told the noon excursion was about 2-1/2 hours, so we figured we’d have plenty of time afterward before having to head back, but in reality it lasted almost 3-1/2 hours, so the rest was cut short.

Just another colorful day on the island!

Philipsburg Courthouse

Map of the island.  I think I may see some Dharma Stations...

Even Santa likes a nice island break after the holidays.

One thing we noticed during each of our port visits, was that during the months after the time returns to Standard Time in the US, most ports stay on Daylight Savings Time (or the local equivalent). We were never really told to make sure we stayed on “ship time”, the time all excursions were based on. It was consistently different than the actual local time on the islands.  While my son did wear a watch on occasion, cell phones synch to local time and we were never quite sure what the real, true ship time was. When you have a constant fear of stranding your family in a strange island country while sadly waving goodbye as your cruise ship sails away without you, this can be a nagging worry… Luckily we never actually had that problem.

Back on the ship, one of the highlights of the cruise was “Superstar Live,” the live band karaoke in the Ebony Lounge. Both my son and daughter, who are excellent singers, made their parents proud by performing for an extremely appreciative audience.  Karaoke is a cruise ship standard entertainment, and I’m very glad Carnival chooses to use this unique live style of musical performance rather than standard recorded tunes.

Superstar #1

Superstar #2

My son and I stayed for the adult comedy show later that evening at George Lopez’s Punchliner Comedy Club, which was another step in my transition of parent of a kid to parent of a young adult. Not to get too much into personal family dynamics, but he’s been through a lot of changes in his relationship to his mom and me over the past year, and sharing adult humor with him was an interesting step I hadn’t thought to take.  Regardless, the comedian was a self-proclaimed “nerd/rap” comedian named who used numerous pop culture and kid game references in his act.  Being an “adult” act, the language got raw at times but not too bad.  However, as is the case with most comic acts out there, the language often gets in the way of the comedy and prevents a normally great show from being accessible to all ages. That’s a long-standing rant of mine and has nothing to do with Carnival, really, although I suppose from a marketing standpoint, “adult” shows draw bigger, older crowds and sell more drinks than family-friendly shows, so take that as you will.

Day 5, Dec 31 (San Juan, Puerto Rico)

Today there were at least six ships in port, not to mention one that left and another that docked while we were there.  Busy, busy, busy....

This was a day of good intentions gone slightly bad. In 2012 on the Valor, we were in San Juan during early October, which seems to be a fairly low key time of year for visitors. Visiting the old city of San Juan was a breeze, as the free trolleys came along every 5-10 minutes and could whisk you away to wherever you wanted to go.  We thought it might be fun for the kids to show them some of the same sights and save money on a short excursion. However, it wasn’t exactly the same situation this time on New Year’s Eve.  There were six – count’em, six! – other cruise ships in port with us, including the Carnival Sunshine and the Disney Fantasy,  traffic was jammed up all over and people were everywhere.  While the day wasn’t terribly hot, walking the length and breadth of Old San Juan is not for the faint of heart.  After exploring a bit of Fort San Cristobal in the northeast corner, visiting with some sunning iguanas in an old walled area, and trying to walk to the Fort Felipe del Morro and the old cemetery, we did finally catch a free trolley and rode it for a visual tour of the town.  Heavy traffic and New Year’s Eve revelers kept progress slow and we eventually made it to Senor Frog’s near the cruise port.  Senor Frog’s is a Margaritaville-wannabe restaurant that is family-friendly with balloon animals for the kiddies in the front, and loud, drunken frat party in the back.  Guess where we were seated?

Beautiful battlements and other fort relics in Old San Juan

Me, wife and son why daughter takes the photo...

Christmas decorations still up in many locations.

A scaly native suns himself on a battlement.

I kid you not, we overheard someone on a cell phone walk by and tell the other person this was some "chick with a baby and three weird looking guys."

Nonetheless, after a visit with numerous street vendors we returned to the Glory for New Year’s Eve fun.  While the visit to Old San Juan wasn’t a total loss, it was probably the low point of our trip.

Panoramic shot of several of the ships in port together

These poor folks' friend apparently got raptured and they never even noticed...

Life-size bobblehead guy.  Apparently they were all over town that day.  This one kept putting on and taking off his head as he walked. Very disconcerting....

Don't you have a giant seahorse statue in your town?

The city is very colorful.

Backside of the Disney Fantasy, with Dumbo and Timothy.  Ah...someday.

The night’s show in the Amber Theatre was “Divas”, of which the less said, the better.  Again, more on that later.

A few words about the ship band, The Regulators.  As mentioned before, they played for Superstar Live twice during the trip as well as playing numerous times on the Casino stage in a variety of styles and genres.  I thought they were a decent cover band, not too remarkable, although I wasn’t a big fan of the female vocalist.  That evening they started playing for the New Year’s Eve celebration at 8:30 and apparently played straight until almost 11:45 on the Lido Deck stage as more and more passengers poured onto the deck for the coming celebration.  My daughter elected to bypass the festivities and turn in early but my son and wife and I found a spot on deck and enjoyed the excitement.  The poor girl singer’s voice was obviously about shot by that time of the evening and I felt bad for her – as a vocalist and sometimes vocal coach, I hate to see someone pushing themselves too hard.    

One of the trip highlights for me was seeing all the seemingly thousands of passengers crammed on Lido and all the surrounding open areas of the Glory, celebrating, drinking champagne, and toasting as the countdown reached 2015. 

Mr. Towel Froggy is ready for New Year's revelries.

But my son decided to appropriate the glasses for himself.  Ok, actually I did, and I put them on him myself.

HONK!

Happy New Year 2015!

Watch the Video

 

 

Day 6, Jan 1 (Grand Turk)

Another familiar port, Grand Turk in the Turks and Caicos was a lot of fun.  We arranged beforehand to rent a golf cart so the four of us could tool around the island at our leisure.  Being a relatively small island, and having visited there before, we were easily able to navigate and find our way around. Even driving on the left-hand side of the road was much easier in a golf cart!  In fact, I would recommend taking a golf cart rather than a regular tour if you’ve been to the island before, as it truly does have a good bit of charm when you view the historic spots up close and in person rather than from a bus window.

These little fellows were everywhere we went, and seem to roam free around the island.  They were quite tame and friendly.

Waters were several different amazing shades of blue...

Still in the Christmas spirit

We visited the lighthouse on the northern point, the History Museum which was a kick because the lady working there was an ex-pat from the States.  Also the John Glenn Friendship 7 memorial and the Grand Turk Inn were all charming.  The architecture and street design reminded me a lot of some of the Florida Gulf Coastal communities that I’ve visited (accounting for a difference in income levels).

Recreation of John Glenn's Friendship 7 capsule that splashed down just off shore in 1962

The island's History Museum houses a working model of the lighthouse searchlight

Lighthouse at the northern edge of the island.

One of the beaches features this rusting shipwreck hulk. Is it haunted?  Could be!

The Grand Turk cruise port was built specifically by and for Carnival, and includes a giant Margaritaville restaurant that features a pool and swim-up bar as well as large outdoor dining area.  We relaxed, grabbed a couple Cheeseburgers in Paradise and swam in the beach area near the ship before returning onboard.

So close to shore you could just grab it.

The Carnival Sunshine followed us from San Juan, and was parked right across the pier from the Glory. Walking between two hulking cruise ships makes you feel like you’re walking down a street in Manhattan sometimes, but as Glory pulled away before the Sunshine, it was fun watching the large sister ship slip by and their passengers wave at us.

Carnival Glory and Carnival Sunshine, sister ships. No fighting, ladies...

The show in the Amber Palace Theatre that night had an unremarkable theme (we’re almost there! Be patient!) so we decided to visit the Punchliner Comedy Club again, this time for the family show from a Paula Deen-like comedienne whose name escapes me.  She was funny, but some of her material, while not actually lifted from other comedians, was of the “old groaner” type variety.  I mean, I don’t know who first said it – maybe it was her! – but I’ve heard the bit about how “in the South, you can say anything you want about someone as long as you follow it up with, ‘ bless their heart’”.  It’s an overused comedy cliché nowadays, and I’m surprised it’s being used in current material. It’s the modern equivalent of “Take my wife, please” and “A guy walked up to me and said he hadn’t had a belt in days. So I hit him.”  My wife decided to turn in early, and my daughter used her magic daughter powers to talk me into letting her attend the next “Adults Only 18+” comedy show with her brother.  Ah, the things we do for our kids….  That comedian’s language was very blue, but he was really funny and definitely the best of the three we saw that week.  After he was finished, she went back to the room, my son went exploring and I stayed and heard the Paula Deen clone do her adult set.  It was better than her family act, actually, and while her language wasn’t quite as salty the subject matter was definitely more adult.  Overall I would rate the comics I saw onboard the Glory as about a B.

After her act was over, I joined my son at the Seaside Theatre on the Lido Deck to watch the second half of the Ohio State-Alabama playoff game. Being a Tennessee fan first and a fan of the SEC, it nonetheless was great fun watching the Tide get bumped off by the Buckeyes.

Snail Towel animal

Day 7, Jan 2 (Third Sea Day)

This was a day of mostly sunning on the Lido Deck and general relaxation. Not a whole lot remarkable to report on this final full day on the Carnival Glory, although I did get another Guy’s Burger Joint meal.  Here’s a tip, don’t outsmart yourself and get one with all the fixing’s, like BBQ sauce, onion rings and five heads of lettuce worth of shavings.  Go for the basics and let the burger taste shine through with a minimum of toppings.  (I never did figure out what the “donkey sauce” they offered was, and I’m not sure I wanted to).

Very, very, very good middle of the day as we all watched my beloved Tennessee Volunteer football team demolish the Iowa Hawkeyes in the Gator Bowl/Taxslayer Bowl. We watched with a number of other UT fans in the EA Sports Bar, which I hadn’t been in before to that point.  About halfway through the game, a crew girl came in and abruptly changed the big screens to a Sports Trivia game that had been ongoing throughout the week.  We were able to continue watching the game on one of the big screens after asking the bartender to switch one of them back, but it would have been nice if she had come in and at least acknowledged people were watching a game.  But it’s funny, because she was probably the last crew member who should have been hosting Sports Trivia.  Let’s just say she didn’t know how to pronounce “Lasorda” and leave it at that.

Ok, the final Amber Palace show was “Epic Rock” and we all actually enjoyed this one a good deal.  Here’s my gripe about this semi-nightly entertainment venue.  Carnival has installed an amazing, state-of-the-art video projection screen that moves on and off stage, and displays a number of gorgeous backgrounds that support the singers onstage.  The special effects, combined with the lighting, that they were able to create was fantastic.  Unfortunately, the overall vocal talent of the eight singers was really nothing to write home about.  There were four guys and four ladies, two of each had the bulk of the solo works and the other four were mostly back-up.  Maybe it was the sound mix (the instrumental music was often way too hot), maybe it was the song selection – especially in the truly bad “Divas” show, maybe it was the excessive choreography and over-the-top staging, maybe it was a number of other factors, but when I go to see a show, and especially a revue, I want to hear top-notch singing.  Everything else (unless there’s a live band) should be secondary.  But for the three shows we saw, it was more about the spectacle and less about the actual performance.  I want to be fair and give them every chance, and truly the final Epic Rock show was above average, but the others were average or below, and I don’t pay for that kind of entertainment on a cruise ship.

A suggestion to Carnival: use your video projections to create beautiful vistas, stunning backgrounds and effects that supplement the performers, not overshadow them, and make sure you have top-notch arrangers and singers with adequate rehearsal to really make the songs shine.  Ok, off my performer’s soap box!

My son and I revisited the Piano Bar for a while.  I think the performer’s name was Kyle.  The Piano Bar, a staple on board cruise ships, is called the Cinn-a-Bar on the Glory (I supposed cinnamon is a color?).  Kyle was much more upbeat and personable than the pianist on the Valor two years ago - he was a bit of a grouch and it looked like that was the last place in the world he wanted to be…

I took my customary last walk around the deck of the ship, came back to the cabin and packed and went to bed.

One last thing before the end of the day – there were probably about five other cruise ships in the waters around us all day, and at night with lights blazing it was a magnificent sight.

Awww....

Day 8, Jan 3 (Debarkation Day)

Getting off the Glory in Miami was even easier than getting onboard.  If you can at all carry your own luggage, and don’t have to wait for a transfer to the airport or another type of non-personal transportation, I would highly recommend it.  We got into Miami overnight, and they actually started letting people debark around 7:30.  We got up, had a light breakfast, and blew the multi-colored popsicle stand to return to our car, unscathed, by around 8:30.

The 12-hour drive from Miami to Knoxville – non-stop this time – was marred once again by inexplicable construction traffic slowdowns south of Atlanta and some torrential rain, and we didn’t end up making it back in town until 12:30 am the next morning.  But it was worth it!

Some Final Random Observations and Stuff I Forgot:

· The Cruise Director was a fun guy named Dr. E.  I often wonder how much the Cruise Director really does except to be the entertainment face and voice on the ship, as he was a good singer and even better partier with the guests.  I’d love to see an interview with one of these guys sometime and learn how much they’re actually like Julie from The Love Boat.
· It’s very odd how Carnival can be so efficient with their serving lines and other food services, and yet there’s always a line ten people deep for the 24-hour-a-day pizza and the popcorn at the Seaside Theatre on movie nights.  Here’s a hint: put more than one or two guys making pizzas, or maybe install more ovens so I don’t have to wait 20 minutes for a slice of pepperoni, and fill up the popcorn popper with popcorn before you start serving it out, so people don’t always have to wait in line for each separate batch to pop.  I know, I know, first world problems…
· How fun would it have been to have a live band on New Year’s Eve that was maybe not a headliner, or one that might show up on one of the Carnival Live! cruises, but is still fairly well known.  How about Paul Shaffer and the CBS Orchestra or the Tonight Show band?  Or the Tower of Power horns?  Ok, I’m dreaming, but it’s such a big special occasion it might even sell more cabins for a NYE cruise.
· Can’t say enough about the friendliness of the cabin stewards (who also learned our first names), the waiters and the restaurant staff, and all the folks working hard to keep the ship clean and safe the whole week.  And the day we debark, they get to do it all over again for another week.
· I miss the midnight buffets, and the big end-of-the-cruise dessert buffets with the decorative pastries and ice carvings L  Whatever happened to those?  Also whatever happened to the Bridge Tours?  Maybe I missed it, but I never saw it offered like it used to be…
· The balcony outside the cabin is el primo and was greatly enjoyed at all hours of the day and evening.  It is so choice….if you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up.
· One of the movies shown during movie night at the Seaside Theatre was the tearjerker, “The Fault in Our Stars”.  Half the audience was sniffling and sobbing and I decided to leave early because (*SPOILER*) once they guy’s cancer came back and his girlfriend didn’t have much longer to live, I knew it wasn’t going to turn out well.  But was that really a great choice for a happy cruise movie?  *sniff*
· Speaking of happy, I finally learned all about the song, “Happy”, and we determined what everyone knows, that “YMCA” is played w-a-a-a-a-y too much.

Final Thoughts

The dynamic is very different cruising with two kids when you’re used to cruising with just your spouse.  It wasn’t bad at all, and I wouldn’t have changed the experience for anything, but it’s just different.  You have to start thinking what’s best for everyone, and as a dad I feel it’s my responsibility to make sure everyone is happy, well fed, well rested, and all with a minimum of bloodshed (including my own).  Less opportunity for spontaneity, and with two kids who are young adults you aren’t able to just tell them where we’re all going next, you have to have buy-in to keep a respectful attitude.  Again, not bad at all, just different.

Overall, the cruise was a lot of fun and although my wife and I visited all ports we’d been to before everything was new and different in its own way.

Carnival continues to give us pretty much everything we could hope for and at an overall great price.  We’re looking forward to our next trip, whenever that may be.  

Art for Ourselves or Art for Others?

There has always been a difference of opinion regarding why we make art.  Do you, as an artist, create a work of art - be it music, painting, sculpture, play, novel or anything else - for  yourself?  Or do you create it for others?

I have met many people over the years who blog, and I recall a good many of them say they blog for themselves - not others.  In some cases they create their blog as a kind of therapeutic exercise for themselves, putting their thoughts and feelings out there on the screen to fill their own needs.  If others come along, happening to read these thoughts and in turn have opinions - it really doesn't matter, because the blogger writes the words for himself or herself only.  Other peoples' opinions and reactions are ultimately unimportant.  The act of artistic creation is an expression of the artist's soul, and as such is ultimately truly  meaningful for them alone.

Some visual artists use pigments or clay or a myriad of other mediums to bring to life a figment of their imaginations.  It is said some cannot exist without transforming these feelings into a vibrant visual representation.  These souls create painting after painting and keep them to themselves, holding on to them as they would their own innermost thoughts.  Similar stories and actions echo throughout the artistic world.

But still others use their talents to create artistic works for other reasons, not simply for themselves.  True, all artists must draw from within to ensure originality, but for some that's not the only goal or encouragement.  For a playwright, the sound of audience laughter, or crying, or even abject silence, is a sign that the story he has written has touched someone in a profound way. Some musicians create a composition, or play a concerto, because they know that by putting just the right notes in the right combination they can change another person's life.

So which is better?  I have my own reasons for the things I do, and the reasons I work to create art in my own eclectic and unusual ways.  I can give my opinion on which I prefer, and defend it if necessary - but I really would just rather hear what other people have to say.

You out there, you who are an artist.  Why do you create art, and who is it for?

Top 10 Things I Took Away from Social Slam 2013

I figured I'd better open up The Inn again, since apparently it's fashionable again to blog--(oops, that's #7)

Anyway, in the spirit of one of things the things I learned at Social Slam 2013, held this afternoon in Knoxville, TN, here is my top 10 list of the most important, the most relevant, the most memorable (are those enough keywords?) things I learned today.

10)  There is still a growing "factionalization" of Social Media sites (I think I just coined a word).  No matter how much we hear the mantra of cross-channel and multi-channel content creation, some Social sites still have their major supporters and major detractors.  I personally still rarely use, nor see much value with Pinterest but it still has a large and vocal following.  Google + remains a mystery in it usefulness to me, as it does a lot of the crowd but some still swear by it.  I enjoy the rich business connection potential and useful Groups and other professional connectivity of LinkedIn, but some declare it little more than useless.  Some still decry Facebook and even Twitter, and there are still some hardy Instagram users out there.  Some fierce possessiveness still exists, and middle ground on some platforms seems difficult to achieve.

9) Vine is still basically a novelty.  Since half of the smart phones out there still can't run Vine (it's not available as of yet on Android devices), only the Apple contingent has access to it.  And of that group, it seems few consider it more than a souped up Animated GIF creator.  It may have its uses, and its greatest popularity may be yet to come, but not yet.

8) The most powerful force on the internet is not content, it's not community and it's not Mark Schaefer.  It's snark.

7) Blogging keeps circling back and forth and back and forth as being the most important Social Media tool. It seems to come and go in cycles, and now it's back again.  I think there's a reason for this, and I explain it in #1.

6) Nobody still has anything good to say about Klout :(  C'mon folks, if it's all you got, it's all you got.  Throw me a bone, here...

5) For all its good intentions as to putting the Social in Social Media, for me Social Slam remains a decidedly online-only event.  I rarely manage to bring another person from my work team with me to the event, and most of the local people I know that come to the event or are in the Social Media Knoxville group either organize the event, work the event, are speakers, or come in large groups of their own from PR houses or local media.  As such, I only spoke to a very small handful of people in person - the vast majority of my interaction during the day was through Twitter and using #soslam.  I realize I'm speaking totally for myself here, as someone who is a big introvert in large live social activities where I don't really know anyone.  I'm not making an actual complaint or offering up some kind of solution or suggestion, just that people like me exist and it would be nice if I could find a way to interact with more people I don't know at the event.

Caveat: This time of year I'm almost always working on a show, so my evenings are filled up with rehearsals and I wasn't able to make either the "night before" or "night of" parties.  Again, Your Mileage May Vary, but the actual social events weren't available for me.

4) If your presentation is lacking, the audience will turn on you.  There were a couple of presenters today who seemed to either wander far afield from their stated topic, or whose comments on stage began to border on insulting and unkind.  The attending community recognized this and reacted in kind online.  A living example of a community in action, both live and online.

3) Content is still, always has been, and always will be, king.  And I love the fact that this one nugget of truth is still held tightly by all who profess to see the value in Social Media and websites in general.  With all the talk of platforms and factions and tools and channels, good (great!) and interesting content is always the goal.

2) Raw, emotional, personal first-hand eyewitness accounts of 9/11 can still hold an audience enraptured and close to tears.  And it reinforced the idea that authenticity in content will attract and hold readership. But most importantly, damn, I hate that day.

1) There's nothing new under the sun.  As a long-time online healthcare marketing professional, I've attended several annual sessions of Greystone.net's Healthcare Internet Conference over the years. As such, I've seen the most popular and most emphasized topics range from simple website design to blogging to podcasts to multimedia to social to mobile and beyond.  I've also recognized points in time where the online world was catching its breath and really waiting for "the next big thing" to hit.  I think Social Media is at that point now, and Social Slam is caught up in the waiting game as well.  None of the main speakers or breakout sessions (that I attended) addressed to any great extent anything really cutting edge or new in either technology, innovation or cultural change.  Facebook and Twitter subjects still dominated the tool discussions, and other new online cultural changes were hard to find in the presentations.  Some years I go to these conferences and can scarcely contain myself from jumping right into all the new things and apps I wanted to try out.  Other than several good, new things from Google I hadn't heard of that my friend @shanerhyne spoke of, I would be hard pressed to really name any particular new items of interest to follow up on.

Mind you, this is not necessarily a bad thing.  In fact, it's really not a bad thing at all.  It means that we can take a break from discussing the latest uber-popular platforms and concentrate on the core topics - the big "C's": content, culture, and clarity.  I came away with a lot of confidence and excitement of the possibilities of how I can improve my content creation - both at my job as Website Coordinator for a large local healthcare company, and for my personal online projects.

So, congratulations, Social Slam - I think 2013 was another successful year for this event.  I think it struggled more to find timely "content" for its presentations than it has in previous years but in a way that was ok.  It left the door open to talk about the subjects that really mattered - finding ways to bring genuine, authentic content that you or your organization are passionate about, to those out there who share the same interest, and using those connections and intersections to form, maintain and grow communities.  And that - not Plussing, Liking, Following, Pinning or snarking - that's exactly what it's really all about.

Billions and Billions

This story is, to coin a phrase, fascinating:

An Alien Earth May Be in Our Cosmic Back Yard

"Looking at thousands of red dwarf stars in the Kepler field, the lead investigator (Courtney Dressing from the Center for Astrophysics) found several dozen stars with candidate planets (probable companions that have not yet been confirmed). Out of those, she found three that were about the size of Earth, as well as being in their stars’ habitable zones, the right distance from their stars to have liquid water. Accounting for planets with orbits that don’t let them transit from our view, what she found is that 6 percent of red dwarf stars have Earth-sized planets at the right distance from the star to be potentially habitable.

That’s 1 out of 16. Out of 75 billion stars. That’s a lot of Earths. In fact, using that number and applying some statistics, Dressing and her team calculate that on average, in this part of the galaxy, Earth-like planets are only 13 light-years apart. That’s a long way to walk, but in galactic terms, that’s incredibly close. Only about three-dozen stars are known that are within 13 light-years of Earth. Could one of them bear a planet like home?"

It boggles the mind that, finally, soon, astronomers in the next 1-2 generations may actually be able to confidently say whether life might exist on other planets throughout the cosmos.

If we can determine the likelihood of life-bearing worlds, we can determine the likelihood of life.

Planets have to fall under certain criteria to have the potential to bear life as we know it. They have to be in a certain habitable "zone" around the sun - within a certain range of radii, to get that "not too hot, not too cold" effect, so liquid water can exist. Likelihood of greenhouse effect, density, etc - all these traits of worlds should eventually come into focus as better and better detection techniques are developed. Eventually, hopefully, astronomers will be able to point to some planet orbiting some star under some particular conditions and say, "Yes, it as a statistical probability that life exits on that world."

Of course, until we are able to visit such a planet (or, miraculously, contact it's inhabitants) we can't know anything for absolute sure. Heck, we live right next door to Mars and as of early 2013 we're still not sure if life ever existed there at all. But we know exponentially more about the possibility of Martian life now than we did even 15 years ago. I would predict if life on Mars exists, or ever did exist, we'll likely know for sure within the next 20 years. We're that close. So based on this article we're also very close, statistically speaking, to making a good, firm prediction about the probability of life on planets outside our solar system.

After years and years of fictional speculation about people loving on other planets around the galaxy - after imagining the lives of people living on Vulcan, Tatooine, Gallifrey, Arakis, Centauri Prime, Caprica, Tangaroa, Krypton, Hala, Aiur and many others - to imagine that the basic building blocks of such a larger universe, habitable planets, may actually exist and that we may confirm it in our lifetime is staggering.

Authority

It seems to be that the nicer person you are, the less authority you project or command - no matter what your position is. It's something I deal with a lot.  And not very well, I might add.

I deal with conflict very tentatively - I'm either too nice (I want people to like each other, and to like me) or, since I'm unfamiliar with the more negative aspect of command, I overstep and become a jerk.  

It's a very tight balance I walk, and as such end up not getting anything done when I really need it to be.

If I'm in a position of authority in some project, and those working for me are not getting the job done or making unreasonable requests, I'm more apt to let it slide.  Or do it myself.  Or compromise, compromise, compromise - rather than take a chance on someone not liking me.

But the first moment I stand up, I do it in such a way that feels - to me - like I'm supposed to do: laying down the rules, requesting all to follow them, and expecting they agree and understand our roles.  But what happens is I'm seen as "brash" or "talking down".  I don't know how to do it - I don't know how other people do it.

Well, I do, in a way. It's called charisma, and confidence.  You can't have confidence without success, and you can't have success without the charisma to command.  I have no real charisma, except that which is bound up in my "niceness".  And that has no real ability to command respect - even when my position requires it.  So it's a deadly circle that I see no hope of ever escaping.

Well, there would be one way - abandon the niceness, and worrying about whether people like me.  But that would mean completely throwing away who am I and becoming a jerk full time.  Which totally defeats the purpose.

So I'm stuck.  The cycle continues.

It's a Wonderful Life

Tonight is opening night for "It's a Wonderful Life" at the Children's Theatre of Knoxville.  I have had a blast working with this great group of young actors - their talent, professionalism and enthusiasm has been a blessing. This weekend's shows are tonight at 7pm, Saturday at 1pm and 5pm and Sunday at 3pm, then continues for two more weekends after that.

Please make time to come see this adaptation of the holiday classic with Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed. There is something special and meaningful about being reminded, especially this time of year - especially this time of the Age, that each of us MATTER.  We all affect everyone around us, we all have the potential to do great things, and there has never been anyone born that would've been better off not being on the Earth.  What we do with our lives is up to us, and we shouldn't be convinced everything's out of our hands.

Remember, even in a small way, you can do something important.  No one is truly alone.  And no man is a failure if he has friends.

http://www.childrenstheatreknoxville.com 

Sounds of Knoxville Theatre

The latest episode of my Knoxville theatre podcast, The Sounds of Knoxville Theatre, is online.

I'd like to extend a special invitation to those of you who haven't heard my podcast - if you have any interest in theatre in the Knoxville and surrounding counties, take a listen to the podcast.  Every week (or so) I outline what's coming up in the theatre productions and auditions around the area, and usually have an interview with someone involved with Knoxville theatre.  Enjoy!

Scenes From a Hat

Yes. This. More.

The Silent Clock

Flipping randomly through my Netflix Streaming Queue, I came upon 24.  The early-to-mid-2000's series about Jack Bauer and the fictional Counter-Terrorism Unit (CTU) figured heavily on my weekly must-see shows of that time period.  In fact, I already own several seasons on DVD.

I remember when 24 first premiered, it was only a few weeks after 9/11.  The premiere episode included an airplane bombing - naturally, that the producers considered cutting the sequence or postponing the episode.  Eventually it aired, uncut, and the series went on for another 7 seasons.

24 associated, fairly or not, with the Bush era of heightened awareness of our state of security, and the steps we as a country would take to secure our own safety, both home and abroad.  The producers of the show swung to both ends of the spectrum throughout its run, and the character of Bauer went with it.  Torture, terrorism, two (!) separate nuclear explosions and numerous other attacks from both foreign and domestic ne'er-do-wells served as an intentional/unintentional commentary on our country's own feelings toward its own increased security.

While it can mostly be chalked up to coincidence that the show wrapped up its production only a year or so into President Obama's term (8 seasons is enough for almost any show, especially one that thrives on running constantly in high gear) I wonder what it would have been like during the rest of Obama's term.  With the killing of Osama Bin Laden and the general relaxation of the constant fear of a repeat massive terrorist attack on American soil (not to mention the effects of the Arab Spring), the tenor of the country has changed a bit in that regard.*

Getting back to the original point - in the 30 minutes or so I was on Netflix, I flipped around from episode to episode, season to season, watching bits and pieces and memorable scenes.  I re-watched the assassination of President Palmer, retired spies Tony and Michelle, tragic tech Edward, and others. But, at least at this point, I have no plans to go back and re-watch entire seasons.  This is coming from a guy who went back and re-watched the entire 7 season run of The West Wing (with my son), all 5 seasons of The Dick Van Dyke Show and looks forward to a few years down the road of re-watching all 5 seasons of LOST in their entirety.  I also plan at some point to go back and re-live The X-Files, Picket Fences, Crime Story and probably several others.  Why such an aversion to 24?

I practically lived and breathed the show when it was on - almost as much as LOST.  I can rank my favorite seasons in order off the top of my head (5, 1, 2, 7, 8, 4, 3, 6). I know what "Is Teri died?" means, and was there when the phrase first took off.

I think it relates, in a way, to my ongoing aversion to our annual national Rip Off The Scab Day (also knows as September 11th).  Ever year on the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, we voluntarily re-immerse ourselves in the glamorous mourning of the events of that day.  Jason Bailey of Slate writes:

These programs and others are a part of our continuing attempt to grapple with 9/11, and they raise a simple but difficult question: Why do we keep doing this to ourselves? We watch that horrible morning play itself out again, year after year, one inevitable event after another, helplessly gasping, crying, or screaming at our televisions, knowing that nothing we think or do or say will change a thing. The second plane will crash into the second tower, which will collapse 56 minutes later, and then the first tower will collapse 29 minutes after that. Watching those buildings crumble and take the lives of thousands of Americans is something akin to watching a snuff film. Reliving it all—our last moments of cheery obliviousness, the confusion of those first reports, the utter despair of watching those buildings crumble—is borderline masochistic. Isn’t it?

I feel the same way.  While I'm all for memorials and the occasional tribute, the constant popular re-airing of the footage of that day serves as a voluntary immersion again in all the emotions of 9/11/01.  Most were negative, some were positive, all were strong.  And I think that's what keeps me from going back to 24 - I've lived that life, I've followed those characters, they've drawn me into their world.  Other than the occasional foray to watch a favorite scene again, I have no desire to rip off those scabs once again.  Let it heal.  And move on.

At the end of various episodes in which a major character died, the producers silenced the traditional ticking clock in honor of the deceased.  I think that's a good idea.



* - It would be an interesting comparison to examine the similarities between The West Wing and how it reflected the Clinton White House, moving into the Bush White House, and 24, moving from Bush to Obama.  And how those two TV series reflected and were each shaped by the person occupying the (real) White House at the time.  For 6.9 seasons of its 7 seasons, The West Wing had one duly elected and re-elected president (Jed Bartlett), and another just elected at the very end (Matt Santos).  24 had a succession of Presidents and Vice Presidents over its 8 year run - from the extremely virtuous, yet unre-electable David Palmer to the villainous Charles Logan, at least 3 others in between of different flavors.  A better political sociologist can tackle that one :)

Freedom of Speech

Sometimes the First Amendment allows unfortunate and unwanted speech: 

Supremacist groups to meet in East Tennessee (Knoxnews.com, 9/8/12)  

But when you think of the alternative, you sometimes just have to grit your teeth and bear it.  I still find it amazing this kind of thing exists in the 21st century, and it's even more disheartening to read this:

“Tennessee is one of the states that has a strong presence of all of the major white supremacist groups active right now,” [Anti-Defamation League director of investigative research Mark] Pitcavage said....

Tennessee, where the KKK was formed in 1865, continues to play a key role in re-energizing the white supremacist movement. Pitcavage said a confluence of two factors — the election of Barack Obama and the economy — is driving the white supremacist resurgence, connected to a spike in violent incidents including a shooting at the Sikh Temple of Wisconsin that left six dead, including the shooter, Wade Page, a self-identified neo-Nazi.

But a foiled terrorist plot in Tennessee may have lit the first spark, he said.

In 2008, during Obama’s first presidential campaign, Bells, Tenn., resident Daniel Cowart, 20, and his friend Paul Schlesselman, 18, from Arkansas — both self-described white power skinheads — were caught before they could carry out an assassination attempt against Obama and 88 African-Americans at a school in West Tennessee.

I wonder sometimes what kind of sea change could possibly be hoped for, in that those citizens who actively promote white supremacy, or racial hatred of any kind can find an reason to see beyond color.  What has to happen to change these peoples' hearts and minds?

Congratulations, Dollywood

The Eagles are Wild, man.

Congrats to Dollywood for winning FIVE Golden Ticket Awards, the Theme Park Industry's annual celebration of the best in themed entertainment.  The accolades won by our local amusement area were:

1. Friendliest Park
2. Best Christmas Event
3. Best Food
4. Best Shows
5. Best New Amusement Park Ride of 2012: Wild Eagle

Thunderhead also ranked 4th for Best Wooden Coaster.

The management and staff of Dollywood are top notch..Here's a couple of great podcast interviews From The Season Pass Podcast with Marketing Director Pete Owens:

• Episode #209: Live in Dollywood w/ Manby, Owens & Angello! 8/30/12
• Episode #187: Dollywood 101 With Pete Owens (12/18/2011)

Not to be outdone, here's my podcast review of Opening Day of Dollywood's 2012 Season, along with Rex and The Beast's commentary on Wild Eagle, at RexandtheBeast.com: Audio Journeys Podcast #1203

Back to Work

I think it's about time to drag the old girl out of mothballs...

Who still follows me?  Who still has an active blogroll or RSS feed?  Comment below if you're seeing this.

My company has allowed access to Blogger, so I will be able to blog from work again. Since the web and social media are my job, and part of being a successful online advocate for your brand is to have a strong online presence, I don't feel it's out of line to say personal blogging can enhance some people's professional standing in the digital field.

Social influence is a key element in today's marketing strategies, and it's important for the people behind the brands that are in charge of publicizing their good and services to be trusted sources of information.  Not just the company name, but the people behind the company name - they're the ones that will help sell the name.  So the more online influence a marketer her - personal, public online influence - the more reliable, trusted and influential they'll appear to the outside world.

At least, that's my understanding.

So expect more posts from me, but perhaps fewer daily observations about my life, and more commentary on the professional and special interest topics that catch my eye.  Obviously, healthcare will be a large part of that - particularly acute care services.  But since I'm no doctor (and don't play one on TV) don't expect any medical advice or extensive cross-linking - more about how online, digital and social media can enhance the public's perception of healthcare and how it is received. I think that's a worthwhile goal.

Meanwhile, of course my interest in theatre will continue and I'm sure I will post about my latest exploits upon (and behind, and under) the boards.  Although, you can find more on a regular basis on my podcast, "Sounds of Knoxville Theatre" (http://knoxvilletheatre.blogspot.com).

Also, I'm sure my great love and appreciate for theme parks will show through, especially Disney parks, so expect some comments on the latest developments in Orlando and Anaheim.

Lastly, my wonderful family will surely crop up from time to time, but for privacy's sake I will continue to refer to them anonymously.  For those who have perhaps lost touch in the last few years I've been off the blog circuit, my son, "BrainyBoy" is no longer a boy - he's a young man.  A junior in High School who just today took his first solo drive to school and back.  In my car.  And arrived unscathed there and back home later in the day.   My daughter is "Tink" and is in the eighth grade.  Her resemblance to the 1950's cartoon character has lessened not a bit.  My wife remains my inspiration, my confidant, my partner in crime, and my biggest critic :) And that's not a bad thing!  We anxiously await our 20th anniversary together, with a Carnival Cruise.  I'm sure that will be mentioned as well.

Thank you for your indulgence - again, leave a comment for me, please, if you read this.  Glad to see you.

The Inn is open.

Test

Top Five things we learned from LOST

5) Men of Science and Men of Faith can learn to understand each other

Jack was a doctor, a fixer, a man infused with a supernatural ability to heal that defied explanation and obsessed with finding the best way to solve problems. His inflated sense of purpose prevented him from seeing there are ways to look at issues that don’t require questions and answers – neatly solved riddles tied up with bows and editable on Wikipedia. The concept of accepting truths just because you believe them was alien to him. He was a Man of Science that thought the only way to deal with the world and with life was to analyze it, understand it, and fix it. If it couldn’t be analyzed and couldn’t be understood, it was impossible to fix.

Locke was healed by a miracle. He “looked into the eye of this Island, and what [he] saw...was beautiful.” A man of no particular allegiance to science, much less solving problems or answering questions, he was a man of broken faith. He had faith in his father, faith in his girlfriend, faith in his friends – all faiths that were tested and broken at various times in his life – but the greatest unknown and unanswered question came when he first wiggled his toes lying on the beach. The island healed him and he found a real faith in that not seen.

Jack and Locke were in conflict all through the second season over whether pushing the button in the Swan Hatch was necessary. Locke took it on faith from Desmond that pushing the button would control the power of the island. Jack, finding no real reasoning or explanation to it, resisted. Their inability to understand each other and work together to understanding why they were there split the group over and over again. Until finally, as he returned to the island under Locke’s insistence, Jack set aside his need to fix things himself and took on faith in the island.

All things in the world have explanations – and none of them do. All circumstances, experiences, concepts, phenomena are what we make of them. While it’s tempting to discover the anatomical and biological makeup of our neurological systems and be satisfied with the answer, it doesn’t explain how counting to five can save a life. While we can possibly know precisely what’s inside the Cave of Rainbows and Unicorns and learn how it got there, it doesn’t really help us understand what the light is inside us all. We have to use faith in that not seen to live in the world. We can never truly understand all facts and figures, so it requires faith to fill in the blanks and make it more than its own total.

At the same time, we live in a physical world that requires us to deal with life in physical ways. How we breathe, what we eat, where we find shelter, how we escape from dangerous situations, how we stitch wounds, repair bursa sacs, hunt boar, turn off radio jammers – they’re real world problems that have to be addressed by those resourceful, courageous and creative enough to solve them. What we do with those answers and how we live with them requires faith.

Men of Science and Men of Faith – we have to be both.


4) All the Best Cowboys Don’t Have to Have Daddy Issues (or Mommy Issues)

The relationship between parents and children is not an easy one, and the flaws of those raising children do not magically go away. We all have to deal with the mistakes of our pasts or the inadequacies and inexperience we have as humans – but when we decide to take on the responsibility of raising a child our entire beings must be turned over to caring for and nurturing them. This doesn’t mean we give up our lives, goals, interests, dreams and ambitions to focus 100% on them – we shouldn’t focus 100% on anything regardless of how attractive it is. But having a child means your entire life – your past, present and future are now inextricably reflected in the life of that child.

We saw the majority of the characters on LOST have difficulties coping with their own lives due to inadequate relationships with one or more of their parents (more frequently with fathers, it seems, but I’m not certain in the end that distinction is indicative of anything more significant than the fact that it’s easier for fathers to become separated from their children’s upbringing than mothers. Both parents bear equal responsibilities). Jack’s father, Christian was a drunk and a controlling perfectionist – both traits he visited on his son. Both Penny’s and Sun’s fathers were distant, controlling businessmen who cared more about their status and power than their daughters. Hurley’s dad left abruptly for 17 years, triggering his son’s obsession with food. Sawyer’s father killed his mother and then himself, rather than consider the vengeful effect it would have on his young son. Ben’s father blamed him for his wife’s death during childbirth and physically and emotionally abused him. And so on. All these parents chose their own selfish paths, that kept them from fulfilling their responsibilities to their children. These scars led to the tormented lives of the crash survivors.

But it doesn’t have to be like that. Hopefully Claire (and Kate – talk about “My Two Mommies”) turned out to be a good mother to Aaron because of her experiences on the island. Had they lived, Sun and Jin would have been caring parents of Ji Yeon. Assuming Desmond made it back to Penny and little Charlie, their family should be tight knit and healthy as well. They will all deal with their own issues and memories in the years to come, but knowing the damage that can come from absent, uncaring, abusive or controlling parents should stop the cycle. It only ends once, everything else is just progress.

And we should learn from this, too. As a parent, I gladly take active roles in my kids’ lives and encourage their interests. I try to be firm, but understanding of their needs and opinions. I give them room to grow but a place to feel safe. I teach them to care for other people and care about themselves. It’s what we’re supposed to do – what we have to do. Jack felt taking care of the island was something he was “meant to do” – that sense of parental responsibility was just as strong and instinctual to him as it was in his relationship with his sideways son, David. It’s so important and so obvious.


3) You’re the only one who can give yourself a Tabula Rasa

All the characters on LOST were flawed in some way. A list could be made a mile long of each of the characters’ personal failings, guilts, losses, crimes, and weaknesses. Jacob chose the candidates precisely because they were flawed as he was – possibly these specific people because of issues with their parents, possibly for other reasons. They all had baggage they’ve carried with them for years that remains unresolved and unaddressed.

Sawyer was obsessed with finding the con man responsible for his parents’ deaths. So obsessed, in fact, he took on the con man’s name and persona himself to better understand what it was like to be a con man. And then became one himself. He fathered a daughter he didn’t care about (at the time) and wound up in jail. Eventually the trail of Anthony Cooper led to Australia where he murdered an innocent man in cold blood. His entire life he refused to think himself worthy enough to just be James Ford and find a reasonable, productive pursuit. Like many children, he unnecessarily bore the guilt himself for his parents’ flaws and wore it like a second skin. Only through a leadership role on the island, both with the survivors and in the Dharma Initiative, did he begin to understand that there were better things to do with his life.

Ana Lucia hunted down and killed the man who was responsible for killing her unborn child. This caused her to leave the police force and run away to Sydney, unwilling to bear the responsibility for her actions. Mr. Eko was a drug lord but blamed himself for his brother, Yemi’s death. He could not let go of what he felt was his violent nature. Neither could Sayid – for all the torture and murder he committed over his lifetime he was unable to reconcile his actions with his better nature, that of a good man. He couldn’t let go of his past and start again with a fresh clean slate.

We all have baggage and pasts. In truth, we could all make lists a mile long about ourselves and our failures and regrets in life. How we deal with these trials and challenges that come to us is how we grow as people. Acknowledging a weakness, taking responsibility for a failing, apologizing and making amends for an injury – this is how we put these events in the past and move on. That’s how we are able to really live.

But we can’t wait for people to do this for us. Ben Linus was a dangerous man who did many terrible things in his life but he couldn’t wait for other people to exonerate or forgive him. He couldn’t rely on Jacob considering him “special” – when he wasn’t – to give his life meaning. “What about me??” Ben demanded, and Jacob replied, “What about you?” Ben couldn’t understand then that he didn’t need Jacob’s blessing or attention to be special or to walk away from his demons – he had to do it himself.

We have to have the strength and courage to wipe our slate clean. We can put the past behind us – not to be forgotten, but to be learned from and to remember in times of crisis. We can forgive ourselves for things we’ve done before moving on. Everyone can be redeemed, everyone can start over.


2) There’s No Place Like Home – wherever you make it

You’d think having lived with The Wizard of Oz for oh these 70 years or so people would have learned. But LOST observed that there was still a need to understand just what “home” was all about.

From the moment Oceanic 815 crashed on the island, most everyone was obsessed – rightfully so – with going “home”. As the series progressed, we saw that few of these survivors really had anything at “home” worth returning for. Some, like Locke and Rose, had their injuries or illnesses healed by the island and actually resisted efforts (or at least expressed their reluctance) to returning home.

The Man in Black’s only motivation was to “go home”. In “Across the Sea” we learned he really had no true home, having arrived on the island before being born and having no memory or knowledge of other lands. To him, home was an abstraction It was a concept of someplace different from where he was at the time, to where he was being confined by Jacob. He had no home, nothing to look back to, nothing to find where he could be contented and safe. Home, for him, held no promise of a better life – only one where he could destroy and cause chaos. He was cursed to be forever lost.

Rose and Bernard set the best example. After being more or less abandoned by the rest of the survivors and having no real desire to return to the mainland they made a home where they were. Indeed, their home was each other. Around the one they felt most comfortable and loved, that’s where they built their home… They refused to get involved with Sawyer and Juliet’s attempt to stop Jack from detonating the nuke, and took a risk helping Desmond out of the well – almost at the cost of their own lives. But that was because it threatened the peace and sanctity of their “home” – each other.

Jack and many others finally learned, at the end, that what they were searching for was a home – a place where they could be comfortable, and safe, and free from the concerns of the world. Jack accepted protectorship of the island and made it his (brief) home, but the home he finally ended up with was with the other survivors.

We are constantly on the move, always looking for ways to improve our lives and where we are. In the process we isolate ourselves behind computers, sports, games, drugs, alcohol, sex, laziness, food, indifference, pride – all distractions from simply living our lives with each other the best we can. Reaching out to our families, appreciating our friends, understanding that the more we search for “home” the less likely we are to see it was under our noses all the time.

Which leads us to…



1) If you can’t learn to Live Together, you will Die Alone

There are many phrases and saying in our popular culture that refer to our need for community. One that comes quickly to mind is “No man is an island,” a phrase that has particular resonance with LOST. And island is the epitome of isolation, a small patch of land often surrounded by millions of gallons of water and thousands of miles from the next patch of land. A person alone on an island is completely isolated from the outside world. Even if he possesses complete electronic and satellite contact with civilization, he is still mostly alone.

Jack tells the survivors “If we can't live together, we're going to die alone.” Throughout the series, the survivors and those who came later banded together in mutual dependency. Back in the real world, this was something many of them could not do. They shied away from relationships or found ways to sabotage the ones they had. Locke lost Helen when he couldn’t stop obsessing over his father. Boone’s overprotectiveness and attraction to Shannon kept them from developing a true sibling relationship. Michael was unable to establish a relationship with Walt in his formative years, only truly getting to know his son in their brief time on the island. Even after leaving, Michael’s guilt over his murders of Ana Lucia and Libby and the betrayal of the rest of the survivors built a barrier between himself and Walt that he never repaired. Kate was constantly on the run and made no attempts to build relationships with anyone until the crash. Hurley was convinced his weight caused the deaths of two people in a deck collapse which forced him into a mental institution. Even after leaving and winning the lottery he was convinced his association with others and attempts to do good with the winnings cursed him. Sawyer’s desire for vengeance kept him from letting anyone get close.

Being in a situation where our very survival requires us relying on others is natural. While some of the crash survivors like Shannon were very reluctant to help out, assuming they would be rescued soon, eventually all had to chip in or be shunned. Hurley tricks Sawyer into thinking his selfish and conniving ways were going to get him banished, causing the former con man to do “good deeds” in order to help others and get back in their good graces.

But more than simple survival, LOST proved to us that we can’t go through life alone. We need other people to live. Our lives have no real meaning if we have no one to share them with, and having people around to trust and confide in helps us better understand ourselves and the world around us.

When we choose to isolate ourselves, we purposefully miss a vital understanding – that we don’t exist as a single person, really. We are not truly an island, we are the sum total of our own experiences and the experiences of those we come in contact with. We learn from our interactions with others. Our children, our parents, our friends and lovers. When we pull into our own shells because of guilt and pain we hurt them as much as we hurt ourselves. Refusing to forgive and acknowledge our own sins prevents us from allowing those who love us to forgive us as well. We are never able to find true rest and comforting sense of home until we allow ourselves to let go.

We take pride at times in believing we know everything that is important about ourselves, that only we know what’s best for us. We alone have the ability to fix what’s wrong with us, or fix the problems that come along. We don’t need help from anyone, we can take care of ourselves. Other times we become blinded by great lights, lights of looking too closely to the sun and attempting to find reflections of our own greatness. The resulting wounds can never truly heal without assistance and reassurance by those around us.

We learned many things from LOST, but I believe these are the five most important lessons. They all carefully interrelate, so understanding one can help to understand them all. It comes down to this – love yourself and love others as yourself. One of the greatest truths in life, and it only took 121-1/2 hours of television to bring the message home.

My Complaint of the Day

I'm frail and bruise easily! And I cry.