What's Up With Me?

I'm in a funk.

Can't explain it, really. The normal blargage is still around me: construction on the highway into work. Uncertainty from world events. Fed up with politics and politicos and poliblogs and anything connected with it. Work's tedious but eventful. Will UT find a Quarterback? And other things...

Same old, same old.

I just recently returned from Hilton Head - I should be happy! happy! happy! Well, I am. Sorta.

Could be any number of things, really. I think it boils down to two:

1. My 20th-Year Class Reunion is Friday and Saturday.
   
   I graduated from Knoxville Central Hight School in 1984, fresh and wide-eyed - ready to take on the world. My high school days revolved around two things: arts (band, chorus, drama) and academics (AP English, Trig, History).
   
   I went to my 10th-Year Reunion, well, 10 years ago. A lot of people were there - a lot weren't. I learned that one of my friends has since died. Several had changed - a lot. Quite shocking, in some cases. Some were pleasantly much the same. Some were even better. More than a few of the particular people I hung out with weren't there at all.
   
   So I'm not sure what to think about this weekend. Beth, one of my best friends from high school is coming back for sure. My wife's unable to attend the Saturday night banquet, so (with her blessing and trust) I'm actually going to "escort" my friend Saturday night so I'm looking forward to that.
   
   Just uncertainty. Another friend died not too long ago. Several others will not be there at all. A lot of others will be there that, frankly, I never really knew that well. Will I enjoy myself, renewing old acquaintences and actually sparking new ones? Or will I sit staring at the walls, wishing it were over?
   
   Ok, the real question. What will they think of me? We're all 37-38-39 years old, ten years older than the last time, twenty years since some have seen each other. Do I measure up? Will I impress? Will my hairline scare them? ;) Will some of them scare me? Who got plastic surgery? Botox? Boob jobs? Beer bellies?
   
   Will we actually have anything to talk about besides Bush/Kerry, imminent terrorist disaster, or the upcoming UT football season? I don't know.
   
   Guess I'll find out :)
   
   
2. School Starts Next Monday
   
   Now, I've gone through three "first day of school" rituals with BrainyBoy (v8.5). He's started third grade, and it's old hat for him this time. I haven't met his teacher yet, but don't anticipate any problems. He's a great student, a great kid (if a bit headstrong) and will excel.
   
   But then there's my little girl. GiggleGirl starts kindergarten.
   
   Same school as BB - they'll be there together, every day, brother and sister.
   
   Why does this bother me? I didn't have a problem when BB started kindergarten. "Ok, cool, nice uniform - gotcher backback? - all smiles - let's go!"
   
   But, she's, like....it's GG. She can't go to kindergarten. She's not old enough. You can't be that old. Not yet. Not her.
   
   She turns 5 in September. Can't she stay 4? Just a little while longer?
   
   They wear uniforms at her school - she has some "skorts", and navy blue jumpers. They're all freshly washed (thank you, thank you) and ready for her to "dry run" try on sometime today or tomorrow.
   
   I don't want to see. I'm not sure I can take her looking like a young girl, instead of a little girl.
   
   Don't grow up too fast...
   
   'k?