The Top 9 Indications Your Plans for World Domination Are Not Going Well

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The Top 9 Indications Your Plans for World Domination Are Not Going Well

9> First step: keep American public distracted with World Cup
Football.

8> Your minions built your secret base in a *live* volcano.

7> Every time you get a great world-domination scheme brewing, a
tattered, beaten future version of you comes through another
dimensional doorway and says "Dude! Don't do it!"

6> You notice that the company printer keeps spitting out
Henchman resumes.

5> No matter what you do, some people still insist on using
Linux.

4> Lengthy conversations with your mother as to whether or not
there will be time to make the rulers of all nations grovel at
your feet AFTER your room is clean.

3> Everybody's laughing at you and apparently not because of your
fiendish Laugh Ray.

2> "Ha! They said it was folly to try to create an army of highly
trained and disciplined housecats, but now we'll show them!
March my feline warriors!! Boots, get back in line! Mr.
Whiskers, where do you think you're going? DAMN!"


and the Number 1 Indication Your Plans for World Domination
Are Not Going Well...


1> The planet you're trying to take over: Earth. Your weakness:
Any exposure to a rare element called "oxygen".


[ Copyright 2002 by Chris White ]
[ http://www.topfive.com ]

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